He could just continue to have conjugal visits with his ex. But I am now seeking a different sort of comfort, a comfort that once achieved. You have to work even harder than what you set out to in the beginning of the journey. Hopefully you aren't comfortable hearing this
Professor Z
@Professor42 · 2:01
But I present you with another viewpoint that is the overachievers, the people who have an unsatisfied thirst that cannot be quenched, no matter the achievement, the goal or the outcome. Let's use numbers hypothetically to represent goals. Let's say your goal is five. You reach five, you're happy for about 3 seconds, and then you start to think about six. You reach six and six turns into a borderline, criticizing yourself and thinking, Why not seven?
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 3:28
Yeah. Thank you so much, professor, for providing your perspective. And it can be very hard to consider. Are you comfortably living or not? And the overachieving aspect and components? I thought that was interesting how you had phrased it. It almost sounds like the Kanye West sort of individual who is ranting and raving about the way they want things to go. And I think that's one aspect of overachieving, but it's a skewed, crude way of looking at over achievers
Sontaia Briggs
@PKBriggs · 1:19
But to your point, which I think none of us really think about until it's actually happening. You have to work so hard to maintain whatever it is that you keep seeking, which just requires more work and more destabilization. And that comfort isn't comfortable, right? I think that comfort isn't comfortable. There are moments of extreme pleasure, but there's just a lot of times when you're super uncomfortable because you're always having to do something outside of your Compass
Professor Z
@Professor42 · 4:14
The minute she challenged me, I became one of the top top students in the class. I mean, I aced the class with not one of the highest scores, but close to the highest scores, getting a little bit off topic. But I guess what I'm saying is because I looked up to him and his philosophies and I guess ideology of always trying to be better but then also trying to be better than the goal that you previously set
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:26
This happens to a lot of gamers. I don't know what the scientific term is, but if you sit down too long, you can die. So I think this is the best representation of what it is that I'm talking about. This idea of comfort. This idea of comfort is not the end. It is only the beginning. It is only the beginning. It is only the beginning
Sontaia Briggs
@PKBriggs · 2:44
And then if this comfort comes, discomfort is not really the end, but maybe time for more growth. And I looked at that in that very relational aspect. As you just said, it like we are often in our relationships. We're constantly trying to seek that first moment of bliss or awareness of whatever you feel for each other and all this stuff. And then time goes by, that feeling dissipates and not that the ingredients that made it are gone. But you are in a different space now
Ophelia Johnson
@LadyO · 3:27
I've had to get my license on my own, get a job on my own, navigate through this place on my own. It got to a point where. Okay, I'm a journalist. I'm here. I'm working. I'm just going to sit here, keep my head down, get my money, save and buy a house. And then I said, no, you know what? I'm bigger than this. I'm better than this
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 3:39
And I just went about my day and I'm glad it resonated with you all in such a way because it's painful. This is painful s*** for me coming to grips with comfort that I've had for so many years being actual discomfort to my soul. And it's so fascinating because we often maybe feel as though we are our biggest fan, right? We want to do what's best for us all the time
Ophelia Johnson
@LadyO · 1:59
It's who we are to people who don't really and truly know us. The shadow self is our subconscious and what's really going on below the surface within us. Right. So for the world, we are this wonderful, caring, loving person. Or maybe you're an arrogant a**. Excuse my language, but at any rate, it's how other people see you. But when you deal with the subconscious, those are the things that many of us can't deal with
Sontaia Briggs
@PKBriggs · 1:22
And then I'll hear your words or Lady O's words or Deborah or an infinite third, all anybody, all these brilliant individuals on here many and I'll be disturbed and uncomfortable and to realize I need to continue pushing against the comfort because comfort is comfort is cool for some people. And there's nothing that's not denigrating that or anything. But if you have something you want generally, what you want really bad doesn't live in the space of comfort. It lives in a space of discomfort
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 0:16
This was a great conversation. It made me super comfortable. Was that wrong? It just did all this talk of discomfort. I was like, yeah, I'm just sitting. It very pretty, very comforted by it. Comforted and comfortable. Thank you guys
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 2:59
Why is it negative to us and exploring that could reveal answers to a healthier mind state? So, yeah, I do think it's important to get away from traditional static definitions of words. I was talking about this with a friend of mine who is no longer on swell these days, but we had an interesting conversation to be had about words and definitions and how the meaning of these words change over time and the concept of these words change over time and with comfort