You. A lot of times we don't want to move forward because we don't want to be told we're no good or we don't want our friends and family to look down upon us. Okay, so don't tell your friends and family. I mean, obviously you've got to share things with your significant other to a certain extent, but you can kind of build the groundwork for some of this stuff ahead of time. And an honest self check only really needs to happen within yourself