#AskSwell - Who has put you down the most?
They have got no love lost with you. They don't even know you. And possibly they have not even seen your face. But they can hear you. They can hear the passion that you have in your story. They can at least picture what you have to say
We need to treat both women equally and only by respecting their decision, we can do so. So, yes, most of the time it's our own family and friends that are pulling us down because we are constantly being validated by their choices. We feel that saying no to them would hurt them. And that is the reason, because we love them so much, we can't do things that we choose to do
So I find that in her life also, a lot of people close to her may have put her down, but the spirit to get up and live that life again, if you can have that one spirit, no one can ever break you. And I guess that one spirit is what I always look out for. If I have to learn that, that is what I would learn to accomplish. Thank you so much for sharing your story. Have a lovely day ahead
Hi, Rajat. And I think this topic is one of the crucial topic that we should talk about. And dealing with people who put us down can be a challenging and it is essential to prioritize our well being. And I have encountered people who have tried to put me down in the past, but I have learned that their opinions don't define my worth and what matters most is how I perceive myself and the positive people who supports me
Himanshi Thakur
@GreyMatter · 4:46
So, regarding people letting me down, I have been lucky, thankfully, in past few years. But before that, when I was in school or in college, I was always let down by friends, since I'm a single child. So I never had a lot of social interaction at home. We are a nuclear family and I am a single child, and responsibilities were also there. So I grew up pretty early, but then I never had a lot of friends
Himanshi Thakur
@GreyMatter · 5:00
But I am so spent preparing for this examination that I don't feel like studying for it again. But since I have to become an officer, I'm 29 right now and I have to become an officer. This is one dream of mine. A lot of people have started calling it trap. One faculty in my university was telling me that maybe it is a trap, maybe it is a trap, I don't know. But never ever wanted anything so bad in my life except for this career
And somehow I felt that this is what I always wanted to be and this is what I could ever become. I never kept the choice for myself. So when I grew up and I started giving my SSB interviews, I gave my first attempt for NDA. After ten plus two, I failed. I went for the SSB interview to Bhopal. I failed. I went to another SSB interview to Allahabad. I failed as I failed. My parents watched me as I failed
The second Technical Graduates course interview came again and this was an absentee batch. And somehow, reluctantly, I went for the interview. I went for the interview. There were about 110 people. It was the same SSB which had screened me out in my last attempt. And this time I was in a very foul mode. I went with a do or die situation. I said if I am not shortlisted, I will do something which will make sure that army regrets why they didn't shortlist me
So this is how I want to put it himanshi that sometimes we feel that the game has gone out of our hands. But you know, I just don't say out of reading things from some books. Yes, of course I read a lot of books. But I also back it up with lot of experience. I have a habit of testing whatever is written in the books in order to find out whether it actually works or not
And she constantly, through her strength, give you this message that you don't have to give up on life, and you don't have to pull yourself down because of the challenges. So it's about we learn for life lessons first from our parents itself. Like, if I share that my father, he has been a source of patience, the kind of patience he has had in his life. It was remarkable. Until date, I haven't seen a person as patient as him
The Bookbot Theory
@Bookbot · 3:56
And about the loved ones letting us down, I can actually perhaps sum it up in that one Shidi, which I've always held close to my heart since the time I've heard it. So it's like hamito apno niluta garo medam kanada hamari kashti the dubi bahan jahapani kamta. So I think this is because perhaps maybe we expect a lot from them that the hurt from them seems so high compared to a stranger from whom maybe we don't expect that much, that it hurts
And after about a month's time, when he saw the crystal structure of both of the water in both the glasses, they had completely altered. And this is one of the examples, this is one of the proofs to this date that how our words are a form of energy and how they can make or break somebody's life
Hi, Rajat. You're absolutely true. It is the near and dear ones who are the one who always put us down. The reason is, as you rightly pointed out, they know everything about us, our weaknesses, our strengths and all. Even when they actually want to argue with us or they want to prove us wrong, they actually start focusing or putting things on the weak points, and they start justifying themselves
Yuvraj Jain
@yjain60 · 5:00
Or if that validation is not good enough, then we start blaming the other person. So that's going to be there for the rest of our lives. We can take it for granted and I don't think we should take it for granted that this is how the world will behave, world will remain
As a matter of fact, that the idea at some point of time that we start putting ourselves down comes much later. We have evolved so much through that phase of being put down by everybody around us that after some point of time we started ourselves feeling that, yes, we are not worthy of something in life. So you can go back to your life, trace your footsteps back and start from the place where you first entered into the school. It starts from home first. It starts from home
Yuvraj Jain
@yjain60 · 4:13
You, I really felt you had certain serious points to make, and I could so well relate to it, because sharing from my own personal experience, right from my childhood days, I have been bullied by my own friends and my neighbors when at school, I had to always prove a point that I'm very good at studying. And that was something everybody expected out of me. And even when I was into my teenage period, that was the same expectation that was laid down and changed schools
preethy uthup
@peeli · 3:32
So over a period of time, as I grew up, I started having smaller, smaller wins in my life. And each time I came back with as a win, he was the only person who would say, yeah, you did it, and you can still do more. So that's how he grew me up, to become more confident. And then people come into your life like your spouse. If you have a very supportive spouse, you will be happy
So even though I may have one, as a matter of fact, if you take anybody to a psychiatrist, they will tell you that you have some or the other form of depression. Human beings, at the level of their intelligence, are never supposed to settle down with their mind, because we are the only species who think about the future. No one else in this world thinks about the future, okay?