Dont Dress Code My Daughter: Yep, I’m "THAT MOM"!!
Not suggesting that dress code violations are a nonissue here, but if you're calling me into the school to discuss how my daughter violates the rules, then you better be able to have the larger discussion around how the rules disproportionately affect my daughter and elevate boys in a way that the simpletons in this society will translate into boys are just easier than girls, without taking any accountability to how that short sightedness contributes to and exacerbates that biased theory around simplicity and gender
Not to mention the fact that there's a focus on girls being a distraction, but not on teaching boys to avert their gaze or to put it on us as being responsible for men and their behavior is so ludicrous. But that's a well stated idea thought. I mean, really, if it's about distraction, we could solve this in a number of ways. We still want to have integrated classrooms, right?
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 4:49
Hi, Renee. Bravo. Bravo. I'm a boy mom, but obviously I'm a mom, so I get it. Because I not only grew up in this, it still exists today. We have had a number of conversations here on Swell about women dressing modestly and all those things, and it just still blows my mind that we have these conversations
But at the same time, if you're going to get up there and lecture women about women being a man, if you're going to do that, then how about just adding a little blip of sensitivity, like a one liner? A sentence that, hey, I just want to acknowledge that I am a man and that I don't have daughters and that I don't know what it's like to be a woman in this. No, no. Doesn't even cross their mind. Why?
And then, like you said, turn around and become a total hypocrite in objectifying and applauding those women that they just judged. And you have to feel like it's about abuse, it's about keeping women down or putting them in their place or just projecting whatever frustration that man has in life onto women because they can. In the case of a stranger doing it, then obviously our ability to address the inappropriateness of that man is compromised
And I just want to tell you that I was dying over the comment you made about the woman that you dress coded your daughter and that she was at the bar a week later in the look at me outfit. Anyways, kind of the hypocrisy that I was talking about with Annie Ange in my previous reply. But I just want to say, you know, it already is difficult to raise children, and then raising girls in this society comes with this other level of issues
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:53
So just went about it like I probably would have any other time that you are engaging with someone and just said, hey, I need to meet her parents. I need to know who they are. I need to know what the plan is. Like, are you all playing inside? Are you playing outside? No. I do not want you playing in her room alone, even if her parents are cool with it
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:38
And I'm thinking, well, I'm about to wear this for a date with my man and they sell this for young girls to wear. And so it's know how can you sell it and then, on the other hand, condemn it, make it make sense. And more than anything, just how do we have the perspective, like I did with curse words with my son when he was younger, until the school system taught him good words and bad words
If a public school in this country is calling out children for falling behind on the diagnostic test, what are the majority of those children going to look like? Statistically speaking, they're going to be black. And they were. So this school was calling out children, predominantly black, for failing the test. Now, what happened was a black person stood up and pointed out that you're calling out black children and that black children are disproportionately negatively affected by tests for a reason
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:50
And it's mind boggling to me that we as women do that to each other. Whether it's about our reproductive rights, whether it is about how we live our lives, relationships, how we dress, how we wear our hair, how we dress for certain age ranges, et cetera, that instead of uplifting and supporting and then encouraging one another that there's more of us that are willing to not have words of empowerment or share words of empowerment or support to and for one another