I've got my coping skills and my mechanisms and stuff unlock and so I was coping, but I wasn't really refilling my cup. I was not making sure that I was also nourishing myself. And so I reached a point where I was basically depleted. And I spoke on a little bit in part one, but it was really that element where I could tell it was getting worse. Like the situation was getting worse that I was doing. Not really, not okay gradually