That's a judgment that we make based on the facts I. E. Our bank statements and our paychecks and our bills. We judge those things. We judge people. We draw conclusions about people based on the evidence we have and the facts that we know about that individual. And we decide what kind of person they are to us. We judge people's statements online all the time to decide whether it's an intelligent statement or whether it's a croc. And so we judge all day long
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 4:41
And so they just feel like your selfishness is part of your personality. They don't judge it as a flaw. They judge it as, oh, that's just how she is. That's just how she be acting. Don't mind her. That's just how she is. But it's a real problem. And see, the thing is, when you have people in your life who are not honest with you like that, they hold you back. They really hold you back
Nidhin George 🔷
@geo_rhymes · 4:47
But that being said, it's also quite difficult to expect such criticism and feedback, but worse so to even give such criticism and feedback, it may also have a lot to do with how the world is changing and evolving right now. But one has to be very careful and even considerate about the other person's sentiment, sentimentality orientation. Before you say anything, you have to be almost politically correct, for lack of a better word
DAYDAY Mcclenton
@KINGPOPOFLA · 2:04
Hey, Miss Cole. How you doing? You know what? It is crazy, because you got some that's good judgment, some unkind judgment. You know, you can be like, those shoes are cool, and then you could be like, those they all right. But then somebody be like, those ugly. You know I'm saying? Even though we do it all the time, no matter what we saying out our mouth, that's what we're doing
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 4:50
Hey, Tanya, I agree with what you're saying. I've told people this before. When somebody's like, oh, you're judging. I said, you know, it's always funny to me that if I tell you something that you perceive is something negative about you, that I'm judging you. But when I tell you you're beautiful, you have a great personality, you're a good person, nobody ever says, oh, you judging me
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 4:17
You want to take the sting out of it, so you want to make it sound as pleasant as you can. But once upon a time, criticism and judgment, especially in certain types of industries where you have a lot of eyes on you, it was just a norm and it just came with the territory. It was something we accepted, but now it's become increasingly looked at as being negative when you try to give people honest know
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:10
Just like a judge in a courtroom, they can't rule in a case based on how they personally feel about the situation, about the people involved. They have to be objective. They have to rule based on the evidence that was presented. And so I think there's objective and subjective judgment versus good and bad judgment. Now, with a personal judgment, that's where you get the condemnation
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:04
Hey, SIS, I agree with you a hundred percent. It's not judgment when it's what we want to hear. It's only judgment when it's not what we want to hear. It's only judgment when it offends me. But if it doesn't offend me, if it makes me feel good, then it's not judgment. It's amazing how we can vacillate like that between the two