So should we try to work out amicable child support agreements before going to the court system? I know for women who are seeking government assistance, they have to file child support orders through the court in order to get that assistance most of the time. But in the best circumstances, say you have two responsible parents who just agree that they do not work out together in marriage or as a couple, but they still want to co parent their children
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 5:00
And the man told us, he was like, I've never had a father and a mother come in together and sit here and be calm, cool, and collected, laughing and joking with each other. Like, I've never had that. And that made me sad. But we did
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:59
Now, we know there's some deadbeat dads out there that if you don't take them to court, they ain't paying you a dime. We know that. We got some of those. But I do believe there's some good brothers out there who want to work, who want to take care of their child. But I don't think that any man should be put in the poor house in an effort to get money from him to support a child
Brian Foreman
@BKFOREMAN69 · 4:55
Well, I'll throw in the male perspective from a variety of angles. I'll approach your two responsible adult. One, I feel a piece you're alluding to that you don't mention when you think of responsible adults. I hate to assume, but the assumption is there that they both have sufficient income to take care of the children on their own, if need be
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:57
You're. Good morning. Thanks for posting that. I was actually listening, and I do have some relation to that as far as me and my relationship. You talked about going to court for child support payment. Like, I did have to go to court to finalize the divorce papers because they need to correct it. However, when I went, we had already had a plan for we want to do visitation, any payments, any bills, insurance, car payment, all that
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 3:49
Hi, Tanya. So it doesn't always have to go through the courts. However, anything through the court is legal and it's a binding agreement. Of course, it can be modified at any time. I hate to think of people having a good part of their check being garnished. That's a lot. And I hate to think of people being restricted from other things if they don't pay this particular debt, if you will, or obligation
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:15
People that are financially responsible, people that are high earning, whereas whatever they worked out in the agreement wasn't an issue for him to pay. It wasn't a problem for him to pay. I do agree that with some men or women, if you don't take them to court, you're not going to get anything
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:02
Hey, SIS. Thank you so much for your input. I found it interesting that when you all went to the judge with an amicable agreement that she really wasn't in favor of it. I would think, as a judge, that she would have been pleased that she didn't have to sit down and be the mediator here while you guys try to work out an agreement on child support and visitation and other expenses
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:30
And so, yes, a child support order can be a protection for both parties because, as in the case of the rapper, he made all those payments for years, and they didn't count towards anything because she said it was a gift and he had no other way to prove otherwise. They didn't have a written agreement. It was a verbal agreement. So there was no way for him to prove that these were child support payments
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 3:22
And it's really sad and disheartening when I hear whether it's men on a different podcast or in different groups or on an online forum talking or typing out messages of, oh my gosh, I really want to be active in my child's life, but I know the courts are going to favor the mother, so I fell back. Or I only do what she asks
Shawn Gomez
@sdfxsggrimmlin · 0:25
Do you know that he can sue to get that money back? Even though if the judge finds him in contempt or whatever and saying whatever yada yada, yada is being a gift, it can still be sued. Think about it. You have to be a smart lawyer for that. Like the amber heard. Defamation trial. Nine and a half million dollars for f****** 20,000 words
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 0:35
And so for someone that you don't like and or don't trust, you're asking a lot to trust them with this. That makes a lot of sense. That's a great point