And in this case, I'm just tired of everybody claiming to be triggered when they're really, just, like I said, offended. And those that truly are dealing with paired associations that conjure up terrible memories that caused them, in some ways, to relive that traumatic event. Let them use that language and reserve that language for those that really are dealing with an actual trigger versus something that just rubbed you the wrong way today because you're having a bad day. Thank you so much for listening
Quincy Brown
@Tweetylocc · 1:31
It. Thank you, Ms. Coles. I believe I was perfectly explained. I think today's culture is just mostly offended because that's the way we're socially engineered in society. But we can get into that later. But I have been triggered because us I remember when I worked for a company and it was this one guy, everybody was scared of him. I wasn't scared of him. And they wrongfully terminated me
Luce Fonrose
@ilovelucee · 2:52
You, SIS. So. Yes, I agree. We're seeing a lot of people use words incorrectly. Triggered narcissist. Oh my God, there's so many others. I can't even think about all of them right now at the top of my head, but it's so many words and it's like, did you guys just learn these words? Just throwing them around and not understanding the definition and just using it out of context. So gaslighting too. There you go
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Nidhin George 🔷
@geo_rhymes · 1:25
Hello, Tanya. Great topic. Interesting topic, really. And I've been thinking along the same lines, but first of all, I've never really been able to understand or draw the line between being triggered or being offended. How exactly do you distinguish between the two? Right? And secondly, if a certain situation triggers you or offends you, I believe that is your freedom or your right to dislike that situation or to be offended by it
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 0:40
And so people need to understand that triggering is not just being annoyed or irritated by something, but triggering really is something that is very serious for people who have had to live with it, live through it, and deal with it. So thank you so much for your input
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:45
Hey, SIS. Thank you so much. Like you said, we misuse words. We overuse words. Another one I was going to name as you were speaking was the word toxic. We use the word toxic to describe anything that we feel is quote, unquote, negative, displeasing, dissatisfying. It's toxic or something that we don't agree with. It's toxic. And throw that word around so much that it's just ridiculous
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:22
We just throw them in there because that's what's trending now. Those words are trending now. And so that's what we throw into every conversation. But we have to be able to identify the difference between those two things and just admit, okay, this offended me. It's like people get offended so easily. And just like the previous respondent said, social engineering plays a big role in that
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 3:55
But yeah, I agree that today's world uses triggers a lot and I think it's because of the terminology that's used in therapy, counseling, life coaching, psychiatric services, triggers, trigger, trigger, trigger. It is used a lot for me, I know that trigger for me is when someone raises our voice because my mother used to do it a lot. And when someone yells at me, it's kind of like a memory of how I grew up. It was awful
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 2:10
Yeah, it was in a sense like that. Who does she think she is, man, let me go up on this swell and say some shit. Yeah, there are some people out there that do that for me for whatever reason. It will maybe annoy me or offend me or just get me to where I'm like, okay, let me say something to this shit. And here we go. This is not one of those cases
aamna singh
@aamy · 2:21
You have put it aptly that it has evoked a strong emotional response that is connected with some kind of experience situation, that the person is involved or was involved in the past. And genuinely, there are no symptoms for it. It's just something that kind of evokes something in you and you don't know what to do about it. Whereas when we get offended, typically we just feel a sense of hurt or we feel disrespected or we just put off
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 4:48
And if you have had a traumatic experience in your life and you have not done the work to heal from that traumatic experience, that's not somebody else's fault. Because how does the man in the grocery store who hit the back of your heel with the car how do he know that when you was younger, you hit your mama heel with the back of the car, and she whooped you for 30 minutes in the middle of the store? How did he know that? He'll know you
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:37
I went through a terrible church trauma, and there were certain things that my current pastor would say that would send me to a very dark place mentally and emotionally, because there were words that were used by my former pastor where the trauma took place. So there were certain things that would happen, even down to certain people
Do you go for out of the way to avoid reminders? Do you spend money to avoid reminders? Have your relationships changed because you are less engaged? Is your self esteem worse since the trauma? Identify and manage your triggers when you feel triggered, write down what you were doing, your reactions and thoughts that followed, and whether it was difficult to manage your response
