My Best Freind And My Podcast
Listener warning this episode contains brief instances of mildly strong and offensive language. Listener discretion is advised
I really don't like to get too emotional because when I get emotional, I tend to curse, I get passionate, I get deep, basically. And to me, emotion is not a good thing. But seeing as how I'm talking about my best friend, I think we'll allow myself to do that for once. Anyway, like I said, I posted a swell cast and I left it to a premium
This is the reason why I'm a counselor, because I've literally been to hell and back. And Jellenback, as I said. And because of that, he trusted me. I earned his trust in 2014. And he, he was a good. He was. He was a good guy. He was a good guy. He, he motivated me as much as I motivated him. In other words, it
And because of that, when he was growing up and then when we graduated, because we both ended up graduating together in 1992 from high school, in that same year, he was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, Ms. Now, I don't know too much about that disease. All I know is that it is an autoimmune disease, and it messes with your circulation and it messes with your muscles, and it basically, through time, makes you lose control of your own body
I finally settled down. I finally stopped doing drugs. I finally. I mean, I was still an alcoholic. I'm not gonna lie. By the time 2014 came around, yeah, I was still an alcoholic. But it was different because I was a functioning alcoholic, whereas before, I was just a dead drop drunk, a deadbeat drug addict. I became something that the world could do without
Me as a counselor, I show my clients how to let go of all that baggage, all that bullshit, all that emotional trauma, all that psychological trauma, because I specialize in that. I'm a counselor who specializes in emotional and psychological trauma and suicide prevention because I've also been there. Now, because of all of this, my best friend was able to trust me, which is one of the things I cherish in a client therapist relationship
I have a podcast, a regular podcast that I do, which I need to be working on again, because the last podcast I did was, I think, back in November. It. Anyway, I have a podcast, and in that podcast, I have a three part series, a three part episode series called depression does not know God. And I talk about each and every freaking life altering experience that I had concerning God and my depression
Anyway, 2020 finally came around, and by that time, I had already started what I was telling him I was going to start. I had started my podcast. I had started my book. And he would always encourage me to keep writing in that book, just to finish it. And at least if I didn't have it published, I could make it into an ebook format. And he would always encourage me. He would be like, come on, fucker. You could do this
The fucking pandemic hits us. And yes, I said it right. Pandemic, ladies and gentlemen, don't be fooled. Don't be fooled. Don't kid yourselves. This motherfucking bullshit that we went through was a pandemic, okay? 1918. They had the pandemic for real. That shit was not planned. That was for real. This bullshit was not. Anyway, the pandemic hit us. The pandemic hit us, and we weren't able to go anywhere. We were on lockdown
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If he didn't like you, he would tell you, that's for damn show. It didn't matter if you were a woman. It didn't matter if you was a man. If he didn't like you, straight up fucking tell you that's the way he was. And that day when we were talking, he asked me this really weird question that literally came out of the blue or something. I don't know. It came out of left field
And we just kept on going with our business, with our lives and everything, and back to 2020, back to. Back to December of 2020, rather. Three days before he passes, that's when he hits me with it. Where do you see yourself in ten months? And I said, well, I see myself, hopefully doing what you're doing, working on a computer. I'm not going back to school. I said, I've already did that
All the craziness that he'd been going through his life, in his life, his entire life, it was gone. He was in peace with himself. He had a purpose, and he knew it. He had a goal to fulfill, and he knew it. And because of the life that he was living, he hardly ever got along with his mom. Now he was getting along with his mom. I have a recording