This minister father of hers did unthinkable things to my mother sexually and emotionally. So knowing at a very young age all of that which was explained by my father, I gave my mother love and understanding every time she was abusive to me. I understood where her emotional manipulations, narcissism, insecurities came from. I understand why she put me down, bullied me, and why she unknowingly created what I know now as body dysmorphia. D***
Indigo Traveler
@HealingTraveler · 4:37
So after writing the letter, I hadn't seen my mom or heard from her as I asked. I wanted the generational trauma to stop and she obliged my conditions. We saw her again at my son's graduation, high school graduation, four years later. Things were better. Not great, but better. She was never ugly to my sons again. And I could tell that she was working on how she worded things when she spoke with me
Indigo Traveler
@HealingTraveler · 4:50
I'm so glad that I hung in there. I'm so thankful for that. I know now that I can truly honor her by working every day at being that same example for my young adult sons, for other mothers, and just people in general, I found a way to stay connected with my mom with minimal damage. And instead of waiting for her to die, which is what I first thought, it'll go away when she dies. I realized that would not solve my problem
Indigo Traveler
@HealingTraveler · 4:40
I did see a social worker my parents took me to when I was about 13 and I was developing a stomach ulcer. This was my first lesson. And you can't hold pain in it manifests. It has to go somewhere. And so what I realized then and what grew later into being anxiety, I realized that my mom also struggled with anxiety. Anxiety that came from trauma. I'm here to tell you that life is not going to be easy no matter what
