Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 5:00
Dating Chronicles: Wow I experienced the run away from the opposite side
Physically, it wasn't all of that, but it wasn't as if I just didn't see me at least continuing on dating him to figure out who he was as a person. And I think that this was an example for me to pump the brakes on, making assumptions on people that, oh, if they're not
Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 3:35
Now, another fair thing is that I did have other things going on, and I did have other people in my life that did throw off the chemistry with him and I so I will still stand by. If it feels weird, then, ladies, then sometimes it is weird. But what I will say is that it's also given me the eye opener that I just need to relax a bit more and take it a bit slower in every category, right
Renee Slay
@Renee_Slay · 1:34
And just the same goes for you when you have those conversations and if you picking up the phone. And this goes for you as well as them. And this is just based on the things that I have researched and through my therapy. If just them sleeping in and not picking up the phone is enough to trigger you or trigger them and take them to a place emotionally, then neither is healthy enough to really feed a relationship
Veronica Triplett
@VeeTrip · 2:08
Because a man words means nothing when his actions doesn't, you know, his actions doesn't confirm it. So him showing you that he's insecure is basically showing you that when you get with him, he's going to have those same attributes or maybe even worse. So just thank God in advance that he revealed that to you before it was too late. Well, that's all I'm going to leave you with. I'll say come check me out on my page as well
Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 4:47
So, like, if it's our mom, we like to think she did the best she could, which my mom did. I won't deny that she did the best that her mental level could handle and that she could do. But was it helpful? I mean, was it healthy? It was not. Was the emotional development healthy? It was not. Although I have not done everything right with my son, I have healthy relationship. I mean, healthy conversations with him
Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 3:37
It wasn't an instant spark, but it was like, hey, he's comfortable, he likes me, I enjoy talking to him. It will be a few disagreements that we would have, but overall, I enjoyed him. But he felt as if, hey, he was holding me on a higher pedestal than I was holding him
Veronica Triplett
@VeeTrip · 1:48
It. Okay. Okay. I got you. I got you. That's crazy because that's really like the space I'm into where I'm trying to fix me. And that's what I pray a lot about, that I ask God because I never really prayed before about being a wife. I never really even considered to be a wife before, even though I was in a long, long term relationship, but I knew he wasn't my husband
Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 2:48
Okay. V so since you are someone that has a long history of relationships because mind you, I've had relationships, but I haven't had a lot of long term relationships in my life because of this fear. Like, I'm a fearful avoided attachment style. So I love love, but I fear love at the same time because of my own reasoning. So usually either run at small signs that probably could be worked through to protect myself
Veronica Triplett
@VeeTrip · 3:02
So that's how you have to do what people as well in your personal life. Like if you show them who you are, you show them your hand and they act like they don't want to grab your hand, then guess what? See you later, I'll talk to you later. Some people, they want to talk to you on their time. You feel me?
Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 4:15
And I think that more of us just need to get okay with the fact that everybody that we meet and we have great moments with we won't have great lifetime moments with it won't be over a course of time, and sometimes we just have to appreciate those moments. For me, I feel like I always feel some form I used to feel some form of guilt from things ending, even when I didn't even like it that much. It was just like, it's the end of something
Veronica Triplett
@VeeTrip · 4:02
I need somebody that's there for me on a regular basis, not only when this benefit for them and not for me. And so I realized he's just a selfish lover. It's all about him. And I had to let that go. Sometimes you just got to let people be people, and you got to let them be that over there away from you. And so you have to create if you feel like somebody is not if you don't really like a person
Eluchianna Olive
@Luchianna · 4:53
But nevertheless, I think when you put dating and being in a relationship in its proper category, you understand it better if a person will send you a text or a voicemail, whatever, because you didn't answer their phone calls. It's almost like, why would I want to be with you? That means you really have some deep rooted insecurities that you need to work on. Right. And it's the same thing when we assume we know what somebody else is thinking. We know the answer
Everything Jay
@everythingjay · 5:00
Like, you said you date around, but this one in particular, I just was like, well, maybe he's just a little timid, but it will be like, he just really didn't make a whole lot of effort to communicate or stay in communication until I will be done with the situation. And then he'll be like, Come back around. And he told me, if you stop cutting it off, we can be further