And it's so interesting that I have so much focus and attention on trying to kind of get by as a healthy person, but also wanting to connect and seek others out. And so I think that a lot of people are getting caught in this weird limbo where it's hard to connect with others. So if anyone has any experiences, I would love to hear. I know how daunting this is, and I know how mentally exhausting physical pain can be, especially prolonged pain
And that's frustrating, too, because if I look present in a way that fits those ideas, then it's like keeping the pain and all of the symptoms in the forefront of my mind. And in order for me to thrive, I can't focus or think about how much pain I'm in or what I'm struggling with every hour of every day, because it takes a toll on the mental health. I have to find other things that give me life rather than focusing
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 4:25
So if it's medication, if it's getting into a support group online in person, if it is finding activities and exercises or nutritional pathways that's going to help you feel better, actioning on the things that hurt or that are causing pain is of probably the best use of time, as opposed to just the thought and the rhetoric and the conversations around it. Because for me, I don't know
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
A lot of the illnesses are defined by avoidance and repeated rhetoric or rhetoric. How do you say that word? It's like if we don't take the time for ourselves to heal, we will always hurt. And I for one, I'm having a successful time of dealing with my illnesses because I address them. A lot of people, when they feel fear, they run away from it. I look at it directly and I'm learning that I can get to know myself better by doing this
Claire Ferguson
@clairefergz · 2:33
And sometimes that's a mental pain or something I can't get my mind off of. And yeah, I think that we don't talk about stuff like this enough and make people who feel this way comfortable enough. And I think if we have conversations more often about stuff like this, then people will be more willing to speak about this in more of a positive light. And hey, this happens to me, too
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 1:37
It really does strike a chord with so many people when they hear about an illness or because they don't know how to respond, that they tend to distance themselves or they underestimate you or they don't want to even try getting to know you. And that's part of why I think I'm trying to facilitate more of that discussion. And man, you are so correct about the actionable change that is so huge
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 1:35
I totally appreciate everything you just said right now. I'm really happy to hear that you're kind of having that self reflection and being able to actually implement it to better yourself and better how you handle different things. I really wish, I think that people think that they're self reflective, but that's just not as much the case because like you said, it is really uncomfortable when you hear something and then you're like, whoa, what?
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 3:16
I prefer hearing about these kinds of experiences or these shared instances where it doesn't even necessarily matter. The illness we have. It's just that similarity and that engagement that really makes me feel better, I guess so. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to respond
You are most welcome. I think I would have loved to have had these kinds of conversations years ago, but social media and technology wasn't what it is now. But you made me think of a couple of things. The perceptions, I think it was last year. I don't own a car, and I rent one to run errands every so often
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 1:52
Basically put on that act of everything's fine, we're cool, everything's good. And I think as we age, this is just my experience. I'm not sure, but as we get older, it's almost harder to put on that mask, even though you think it would be the opposite
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 4:19
And so I think that conversations like these are so necessary, it's so, so necessary to kind of bring this more to the forefront and have this awareness by the general public of, like, hey, invisible illnesses exist, or a disability doesn't always appear super obviously for everyone, and that's okay. And if they seem to have the proper paperwork, then good
Matthew Phillips
@Talk77 · 3:15
And what you have to deal with, what your fear is, what your issues are, and how you choose to handle them. That's just my personal opinion. Having been born with cerebral palsy, there are people who deal with Ms. There are other people who deal with other disabilities that I can't think of at the moment
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 1:33
What are some types of events that would really be helpful, that could shed a light on discussing illnesses, but also make space for people to share what's going on in their lives? I think those kind of actionable steps, people don't know. And unfortunately, we don't live in a society where someone's like, oh, I don't know, I'm going to figure it out. No, like most people, it's path of least resistance and they're lazy
Kim Soliz
@apianogirl · 4:59
And my dad didn't want me to do that. He did not want me to take him to get assessed by a psychologist. And I was like, dad, what is your problem? And he said, no one needs to know he's having issues except for the family. And I stood up to him and said, I'm sorry, but no one in our family can, can appropriately diagnose him. He needs help
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 4:43
So I've definitely grown up with a very strong work environment where there's always things that need to be done and you don't really need to sit still. Still. That's something that has had to change for me, that made a huge difference in my life when I got sick is I couldn't sit down. I was having a lot of mental health issues as well that I have had throughout my life
Matthew Phillips
@Talk77 · 3:32
If you're not human, then you won't go through anything like that. So I respect you for sharing. I can appreciate what you go through. And hey, I'm going to be praying for you. And I don't know if you believe in it or not, but the positive attitude and the positive times that you have are great. You're not expected to have every day be positive
Kim Soliz
@apianogirl · 3:11
And I have to think about that in a way that I can be at home and take care of my body and my health and even my mental health where I know others can't. And I remind myself that every day about how blessed I am. And I am really grateful for finding swell and finding people like you on swell that lift my day and help me to feel like I belong again in the world. So thank you so much