@chitchatwithkk
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:55

Relationship PTSD ; Many of us have it

I tried to visit the last person and they never came to visit me or either I would try to go there and then I got no response and there was nothing to move forward to. But the phone calls were a hit. I would talk for two to 3 hours on the phone, get deep conversations, text weekly, a couple of times a week. But it was never a commitment as far as coming together and making a future. Oh, we talked about a future

#ptsd #relationships #askswell #growth #goals #life

@JodiLin65
Jodi Lin
@JodiLin65 · 0:03
I totally agree with this
@LadyFi
Evelyn Phipps
@LadyFi · 2:53
I'm not blaming him. And if there is ever a time, like I told him, that you feel like I am blaming you for something that somebody else did, please bring it to my attention, but don't hurt me about it, don't bash me about it, charge it to my head and not my heart, because I don't mean it to be that way
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@Swell
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15

Welcome to Swell!

@chitchatwithkk
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 3:56

@LadyFi

And then I said, are you serious or are you planning on seeing me or being mutual as far as the pursuing and the commitment and the honesty? And he said something, don't blame me for the other person. I'm not seeing them. And I said, I'm not blaming you. I said, I'm just not trying to repeat cycles. So you have to ask. And I investigate everybody now, too. I look to see what past they have
@HeyItsErica
Erica Jean
@HeyItsErica · 3:01
The only thing I could say is continue to have those boundaries and continue to have your heart protected, but at the same time, listen to the person and give them a chance. There's somebody out there for you for sure, but it always happens when you least expect it. And I know about this through personal experience. It happens when you least expect it. And again, it's easier said than done
@dourbat
Emily Stewart
@dourbat · 4:11

@chitchatwithkk

And I really, really hope that through time and, I don't know, journaling, that's what they tell me to do, that that can help be solved because it's such a thing that so many people are experiencing, especially I can't imagine dating. I mean, it's already hard enough with my age range and if I were any younger or any older, I would be absolutely mortified because I don't know how to navigate anything as is
@Andrea_Speaks
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 4:47

@chitchatwithkk

For instance, I'll say me, for instance, because of what happened in my first marriage, I find it hard to open up and tell people certain things. As someone that I'm dating romantically. Right. I find it hard to open up and tell him certain things because in my first marriage, I was trying to be very open and very honest. And some things that I said, when we got to arguing, he used it back against me
@chitchatwithkk
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 2:37

@HeyItsErica

The being okay with when things may not go exactly how I want them to. I always deal and heal and move on, but I don't want to keep dealing and moving on. I don't want to keep doing that. So I kind of thought to myself, I'm not really looking for nothing serious anyway
@chitchatwithkk
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:37
And it's not that I didn't know, but what I'm getting at is that this is who I am. I'm passionate. I'm caring. And I know that some people take advantage of those things and it's okay because they got an answer for what they do. And I know that I've been hurt many times in life from the beginning of life. But each time that I'm in a situation, it makes me stronger
@chitchatwithkk
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:38
You know, people are afraid of commitment or they grew up in homes to where they didn't see it, so it's unnatural for them. And especially when people having hard times makes people kind of want to step back a little bit. And I'm not giving excuses for anyone's actions, but it's much more than what is said on the surface
@HeyItsErica
Erica Jean
@HeyItsErica · 0:55

@chitchatwithkk

Truthfully, I think we say that to wear it like a badge of honor, that we want to be alone, but nobody truly wants to be alone. And at least you admit that you're not looking for something super serious at this time. But at the same time, it's a balancing act. So I thank you so, so much for sharing your with us. They are always so real, so honest and full of heart. So thank you. Bye
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