"Be a man!" might as well be "Don't be a woman!"
Maybe last year, sometime or so, I came across a woman reflecting on something she had learned in the University class about how boys are raised to be men. It's not how to be a man. It's everything in contrast to what it means to be a woman. Don't be emotional like her, don't be weak like her, don't be sensitive like her, don't like girly frilly things, etc. Etc. And it's all done through shame
Zara Lisbon
@ZLisbon · 4:48
But it's such a tricky thing these days in a world where it's getting harder and harder to even define what it means to be a woman. Not in terms of the trans debate, because that's more a topic of what makes someone labeled a woman versus labeled a man. But more specifically, like, what should an adult human being, like you said, be like? And I think maybe we can skip the stage of saying what makes a true man
Yes. Yes. You know, the more I think about it, it seems really weird that we get hung up on these superficial things, whether it's how we express ourselves or present ourselves or the division of of character traits or not character traits, things attributed to gender or the roles that were expected to play instead of focusing on let's be people of honor and respect, integrity, those kinds of things