When she sees what she's looking for, she will know, and he will know. So in the comments, this got some mixed reviews. There were some women who were like, okay, this totally makes sense to me. And they agreed. And then you had some people that were like, but wait a minute. Shouldn't you communicate your standards and your preferences up front? Shouldn't you communicate the things that you want up front?
Antionette Wiggins
@Queen11 · 2:23
So for me, for this queen, here, my standards and my requirement, I'm letting you know up front because the journey I've been on with meeting men, once I tell them my standards, they walk away automatically because they know they ain't giving me that. So when you ask for nothing, you get nothing, and then you're still disappointed, but at least you're letting each other know what your standards and requirement in is upfront
StephStyle +
@StephStylePlus · 5:00
Conversation, but no hard feelings, no broken hearts, and each person can walk away. I think because there are so many games that are being played in the dating field right now, I think we're making it harder than what it needs to be and asking each other appropriate questions while we're trying to get to know each other. We'll tell everything
Cheyonia Wade
@Chey · 4:49
Dating means that we actually go outside, in public someplace, spend time with each other. But because we're texting I don't understand a textationship. What is that? I need you to pick up the telephone. And it's very different, but it definitely weed out a lot of the bad apples quicker, and it lets you see what you don't want
Antionette Wiggins
@Queen11 · 4:48
I don't mind opening your door because I can't ask you for something that I'm not willing to do for you. Leave sex out of it. And let's get to know each other. Let's take the time to get to know each other. And if I'm not your cup of tea, then guess what, baby? I still love me. I still know how to date me to the right one. Come along
Cheyonia Wade
@Chey · 1:35
You. Hi, Queen. I really do appreciate this reply, and I love that picture. It's beautiful. But I really appreciate you just confirming and reassuring that this is a process. And I'm learning that it is a process of elimination and not inclusion, but it's good to know that I'm not so outdated as people try to make it seem. I know I was raised kind of old school, but it's just certain things just don't even feel right
Eluchianna Olive
@Luchianna · 4:47
You don't have to tell him all that. Just like I like attention. I like time when you are with me, I like you to be present. Right? And if he doesn't know what that means and you're out on a date and he's on his phone, then you know he's not present. I'm going to ask a guy, what do you really look for in a woman? And he should be able to tell you that
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 5:00
If they do, then if they think they are that person, then they continue with the conversation and we go from there. But can't nobody tell me how to talk to a man. Can't nobody tell me how to show up in a relationship. Can't nobody tell me how to date and how to get to know someone that's between me and the person that I'm with. Because every person is different, just like every woman is different
Erica Jean
@HeyItsErica · 3:36
So, yeah, my heart definitely goes out to people who are looking to date. And I'm not saying that as far as a pity party type of thing or feeling bad, but it is hard out here based off of what I've been seeing and hearing. It's hard out here because everyone wears a mask, so to speak. You don't know who to trust and none of us are psychic
So she said, Guess what, I'm just going to sit here and take it one day at a time. I'm going to go out and eat. We're going to talk. We may not be sitting on the phone until 02:00 in the morning and we're going to take time to get to know each other and then make a decision. Because I think Queen said it, you ain't making no decision on you on marrying somebody when you first meet them anyway
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:16
And so, yeah, I know, I know that question is kind of like a conversation starter or a conversation continuer to open up a different type of conversation. But yeah, it might be a question that could be left off the list of first date questions. So thank you so much for this
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:18
Hey, Steph, thank you so much for your response. I do agree that dating in 2023 is challenging. I won't say it's challenging. It's complicated. And I think it's because we as people have made it complicated. So a lot of folks, I believe, nowadays are so afraid of getting hurt that they're trying to safeguard themselves as much as possible. So I see her method as being, like, a safeguard
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:32
Hey, Luciana, I agree with you. You don't have to pour your heart out. You don't have to lay out every heart Desire you have for A relationship, a man, a husband. But like you said, you gave them basic stuff. You like men that are kind. You like men that are romantic. You like men that are adventurous. You Like Men That Are spontaneous, chey things like that, which are pretty general, because spontaneous can Mean a lot of things
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:06
I mean, we wouldn't be there if we weren't looking for something. So I think we're all looking for something. We're not necessarily looking for a man, but we are looking for certain characteristics and attributes in a man. And so that's why we're on the date, that's why we're taking time to get to know this person
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:21
I know a lot of women like to pride themselves on thinking they know exactly how men think. But we as women, we simply don't know how men think entirely. We might see some patterns in men and be like, okay, well, men it seems like men like this, or they tend to go in this direction with that, or they tend to have these types of behaviors or traits based on patterns that we've seen
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:13
But to me, it's not an all or nothing type of thing. I don't have to tell you everything or nothing at all. I can reveal some things, and then we can just do it as on, like, a need to know basis. Okay. As this relationship grows and we become more intimate in our conversation, then, okay, I can share more. As those walls come down and that trust develops, I can share more with you
Antionette Wiggins
@Queen11 · 5:00
Good morning. Good morning, beautiful people. This is the queen. You know, what I realize is that in the dating world, we all have to do what's best for ourselves. What works for you may not work for me. What works for me may not work for you
So it took a while for me to be by myself and feel like I wasn't in bad company and put the phone down and not be dependent on so many other things to have that dependency on something. But I want to ask about the love language because I hear you talk about it and everybody talks about it. I really never heard nothing about it. I knew something about Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars, something like that, but not the love language
Antionette Wiggins
@Queen11 · 5:00
I know me and that person ain't going to be good together because I'm going to be telling them, no, I don't want to do that. I don't want to do that. So let me find somebody who likes the outdoors. But then they also like the comfort of their home. They like just relaxing at home. They like maybe going to dinner, going to a movie, going to a theater, but to just be outside 24,007. I can't date you
