Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 5:14
Los Angeles creates apartment complex for youth aging out of foster care
Now, when a kid is in their late teen years in the state of Virginia, they can go into what's called permanent foster care, meaning that they wouldn't be eligible to adopt, so to speak, because they are almost adults, but they still need a home, they still need safety, they still need a family until they reach 18
Tiffany Jager
@Radical_4Jesus · 2:45
And I would love to see, you know, the church, you know, I feel like we're so good at, at the adoption process and maybe, you know, the foster care, but I would love to see more, you know, more ministries being started, you know, that really target this and the development too, you know, making sure that they are healed from their trauma before they go off into the world and setting them up
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 2:43
Because I know a lot of times in foster care, and you probably even know more, I was in foster care for a little bit, but there's a lot of crises that goes on, and there are a lot of parents, not all, but there are a lot of people that take on foster children just for the monetary gain instead of the well being of the children. And that does not create a healthy environment for the kids
Erica Jean
@HeyItsErica · 2:02
I know, my husband and I, we have thought about adopting a child that's younger so you know there can be an attachment there instead of a child already, just already grown so to speak. But it's just been talks about it so far between me and him. But the fact that they have apartments set up to help the youth transition out is the best thing
Cheyonia Wade
@Chey · 3:12
I think this is a really great idea. I am so happy to hear that this is a step in the process. It's been twelve years now since I lost my brother after monitoring him in group homes, and I always made sure he was in the best group homes. But when he finished or was aging out, he had gotten section eight and he ended up in a really rough neighborhood. And I was like, so stressed out and worried
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 0:27
I was going to give you my wise and heartfelt words, but I'm just going to leave it in the picture that I'm attaching. How's that? Thanks for listening, and thank you so much for sharing this well cast opinion. And I'm glad to see that there are so many, like, minds that are kind of thinking along the same pathway, and that's what makes things work
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:47
But, you know, to be bounced around from four to five different foster homes in a short period of time is really tough on a child because of the attachment, the feelings of abandonment, the feelings of rejection, and not having any contact with your natural mother, it's tough. And there's grandparents linked to that as well. And the grandparents were considered as a kinship placement, but they have substance abuse issues along with other things going on
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:47
Hey, MJ. Thank you so much. I love to hear stories of people who have been in foster care and have triumphed and overcome and became successful in their adulthood. And that's why I'm so excited about this project, because it gives kids that have been in the foster care system an opportunity to not have to start behind the eight ball. They can start in life just like their peers that did grow up with stability, because they have their own place
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:36
I hate that a child feels like I have to do this so that people will want to adopt me, that I have to put myself out there, that I have to make myself someone that they would want to take home. And that's heartbreaking to me
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:03
Hey, Shay, thank you so much for your response. You know, I thought it was a great idea because it wasn't. It was an unusual, unique idea. And I think that's why I like it, because, like I said, you know, foster kids, once they turn 18, it's like you're just free to go. But free to go where? Where do we go?
Erica Jean
@HeyItsErica · 0:57
Hi, Tanya. Good morning. I did not know that, that the kids are basically auctioned. That sounds like slavery. You know, see which slave has the best body, the whitest teeth. You know, that's just crazy to me that the kids are subjected to that. That's. Oh, my gosh. Very heartbreaking. That's very heartbreaking. I didn't even know that. Did not know that
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 1:57
Hey, Tanya, MJ again, going on. No, but I think that the point I'm trying to make is, I'll just use an analogy. If you have a hungry person that is really hungry, right? And all they want to do is eat. We're talking about children in the system. All they want to do is eat. And we put in front of them a plate of spaghetti. Right
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 2:25
I think the idea behind listing their interests and things of that nature is looking at it from a perspective, parents point of view. If they were showing a child who had interests in gaming and hockey and things of that nature, would I be more prone to that child? Or would I personally be prone to someone who's an avid reader, who enjoys science, who participates in dance class?
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:59
At the age of 18, you are allowed to recommit, if you follow rule sets, and you are eligible. Now, I do feel that there should be rule sets when it comes to a child being able to stay in foster care. Many of these children who are in care, they have not gained the insight, they haven't gained the education. The parents have not raised them to where they know what to do with life. And that's why we do therapeutic care
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 4:57
Clear back in 2011, which was quite some time ago, one in 17 kids are in foster care. One in 17, that blew me away. But get this, one in nine are black. One in seven are native American. And then to top it off, black children spend longer time and are far less likely to be reunited and less likely to benefit from the services. Quite some time ago, I had two somalian children, Samira and Letitia. They didn't know how old they were
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 5:00
If there's no kin, then they go to a friend or a fictive kin, which is someone who may be in the school system or someone in the community that knows them, that they grandfather in as family. Then if they can't find anyone, then they go to foster care. They go to the state. And if the state can't find a home, then they go to a private agency, like what I work for
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 1:36
Now chitchat with KK. I'm so glad that you said this. I'm so glad you said this. I never even stopped to think that anyone else would have gone through this. And of course they have. I mean, you hear about horrific stories all the time of abuse of kids, and some kids don't even make it. And I think that my hat is totally off to you for being in the system and working with the system and fighting, because I know you fight
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:53
And right now, because they still have custody, legal custody of their children, they can also, you know, make decisions on their behalf even though the children are in a foster home. And so there's been a lot going on with that, although we have gotten a court order to now transfer those decisions to the foster mom who has been very cooperative in trying to get the children all the services they need. So, yeah, definitely lots and lots of services available
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 0:53
Hey, MJ, thank you so much for your response. Yeah, I mean, the apartment is one piece. I don't see it as a bandaid. I see it as a stepping stone. Personally, I don't think that it's a band aid. I think it's a stepping stone
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:06
Hey, MJ. Thank you for your response to my response to Erica. I hear what you're saying as far as prospective parents wanting to get to know the kids and some of their qualities and some of their likes and dislikes and hobbies and things like that, but to me, it's disheartening for the child because I'm putting myself out there and yet nobody wants to take me home
MJ Brewer
@Mommas_Jungle · 2:39
It's barely enough to squeak the kids through. It's not an extra income. It's not free money. And that's why we get a lot of abusive parents or foster parents in those types of situations. And again, that's very unfortunate. And I do not envy you in the least for your position. However, it's a needed and necessary position. And I'm so glad that someone like you has that position
I think it's an absolutely fabulous idea for them to provide some sort of transitional housing for these kids. I mean, yes, coming out of the foster system and, you know, it also depends on the type of foster parenting that you had. I mean, some of them just want to get that check, and some of them actually are concerned about, you know, the kids and their well being