@Manalika
Manalika Das
@Manalika · 1:05

Q & A Session Part 4: Protective or Controlling: Where is the line?

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So when somebody tells you something, they'll say oh, you should not go there, you should not wear that, you should not do that. Is it protectiveness or is it controlling behavior? So where is that line? There are a lot of dynamics people don't understand between somebody being overprotective or somebody being too controlling. So for that only today I'm going to interviews AMAs and talk about different reasons why somebody becomes overprotective or line controlling and where exactly is the line?

#sayitonswell #whatsyourpov #swellinterviews

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@KavyaNagarajan
Kavya N
@KavyaNagarajan · 0:14
Hi melanica is of course I am doing good. Hope you are also doing good. And first of all, I would like to thank you for a wonderful intro for me and I'm also glad to be a part of your interview. Okay, let's start
@Manalika
Manalika Das
@Manalika · 0:34

Q1. Have you ever felt that someone was being too controlling towards you in the name of being protective? @KavyaNagarajan

Hey, that's really great and thank you so much for this appreciation. So let's just start with the first question. So my question to you would be, have you ever felt that somebody was being too controlling towards you in the name of being protected?
@KavyaNagarajan
Kavya N
@KavyaNagarajan · 1:07

@Manalika

Actually, to be frank, we cannot sell that they are someone or somebody. It is the person who takes rights on us. It can be our parents itself or the wellwishers or other relationships. At many times what I experienced from my parents itself was it is that in the name of protecting they do controlling me in most of the time. One of my experience is that while taking the two wheeler I'm not allowed to drive up to or more than 5
@Manalika
Manalika Das
@Manalika · 2:42

Q2. Have you been the one who tried to control someone in the garb of protection? Did you do anything about it? @KavyaNagarajan

I mean, I've seen a lot of people who say that, oh, my parents are quite protective and they are quite controlling, but on the other hand, they are the same. So have you ever been that person who's was controlling? If no, then it's completely fine. But if yes, did you do anything to change it? Do you think that you should have done something different? Or do you want to change anything? Please let me know about it
@KavyaNagarajan
Kavya N
@KavyaNagarajan · 1:37
Moving on to my question that I never tried to control anyone but in the means of protecting I did so I feel that is for one of my friends I do give some advice on certain things such as blindly believing everyone or if they go in the wrong way and else at that time they feel that I'm controlling them. I'm taking rides on them
@Manalika
Manalika Das
@Manalika · 2:06

Q3. Where do you think is the line between being controlling and being protective? @KavyaNagarajan

So I just wanted to help her. I was not trying to control her. Rather, I knew that the outcome would not be good if she did something that she was asking me about whether I should do or not. So this actually made me realize that on the receiving end, that person would definitely feel that you have been controlling. But on the other hand, you will feel that, oh no, you are not controlling, but you are actually trying to be protective
@Swell
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15

Welcome to Swell!

@KavyaNagarajan
Kavya N
@KavyaNagarajan · 0:51
Oh yeah. By God's grace in my life, my teachers are always lovely one. They know about teaching as well as the students mentality and coming to the relationship. What I have seen is that at one point in time we will be controlling by them in the name of dress or talking with other boyfriends or even the classmates too. Those starts the positive that leads to be controlling the other one. So there is a slight difference between controlling and protective
@Manalika
Manalika Das
@Manalika · 1:57

Q4. Is there anything that you want to share with the people who are listening to this swell? @KavyaNagarajan

On the other hand, for that person, their friends would become everything because that person does not receive the love and the support from their parents. He or she might go towards their friends and learn or accept their advice. So it actually depends upon how you have been brought up, what restrictions or what freedom that you have received in your upbringing. And it definitely changes the dynamics. So, yeah, that was it. I'm so glad that I got your perception as well
@KavyaNagarajan
Kavya N
@KavyaNagarajan · 0:44
Of course, melanica what I want to say is that we always try to protect our loved ones by saying that what is right or wrong, what do or not but we should not force them to do or to be like what we see that is controlling. So for example, I would say that giving suggestions is okay but not for them to take the decision. Likewise do get the suggestions from different person but they're decision should be yours
@Manalika
Manalika Das
@Manalika · 0:44

Thank you so much @KavyaNagarajan

So guys, now that you have listened to all the questions, question and answers, I would really like you guys to visit her profile because I've already mentioned her username and check out her other spells as well. You would absolutely love it. And Carve, thank you so much for taking out your time once again
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