Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 1:12
NAMING SHAME | #TellYourStory - When did moving past your shame open up a new path for you?
Welcome to where the light gets in. This week, we're looking at shame and I wanted to have a hashtag tell your story. Swell. To get some stories gathered about times when we had shame, but we moved past it somehow. And because of that movement, something new opened up for us. So think about an experience like that, and if you are open enough to share it with us, that would be amazing
Susi Lawson
@susisouljourney · 4:52
And I think that was another topic about belonging. It's part of our survival. And I think all dictators are wounded children just getting revenge. I really think it's that deep, that child abuse goes that deep and affects the world, in a way. But I'm going to try to wrap this up with how I got out of the cycle when my daughter was a toddler and I knew something was going on whenever I'd pick her up from a family member
Kim Sinclair
@Sinclairfam123 · 4:58
I'm going to try to do everything right, and it's going to be wonderful. And I had this very romantic vision about what being a mom would be like. And so through the entire pregnancy, I found that I struggled. I struggled physically, I struggled emotionally because I was so physically unwell throughout the whole pregnancy. And somewhere deep inside me, I knew that I was never going to have to push this baby out
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Chhaya Saini
@shimmythatsoul · 1:59
Hello. Hey. Hi. I think for me, there have been many of such instances where I've felt extreme rush of shame and embarrassment. But now, if I look back, I feel that it only helped me to grow as a person, like you also said. And one of the instances that I would want to share here that comes to my mind is that there was this relationship where I was keeping myself
Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 0:44
It's an incredible example that you gave us that if you had shame, you would not have come out and gotten help, but because you knew you had to get help. That's an extraordinary move and it saved your daughter's life and your life. And I just honor that story so much. Thank you
Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 0:48
It's beautiful that you found a therapist and that you're here to tell your story. I appreciate it so much, and I hope more women in your situation understand there's a path forward. And shame is humiliated when you get to talk about yourself and how you're doing. Thank you
Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 1:07
And I think having a whole life, a full life, a balanced life, requires that you root yourself in who you are and the people that are maniacs that really have no other life, that just want you to do the 120 hours week. It's like they're not even looking at the potential for themselves to become bigger than just their job. And it's so beautiful that you found a new company that gave you that sense of like, oh, this is how it is
Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 0:45
And Chhaya, thank you for showing us the example of how shame led you into making pretty consistent decisions to sidestep your value and your worth. And it's a teacher, isn't it, when you start pulling yourself out of those patterns like you did. And it's hard work because gravity is pushing you down towards what's happening, and you have to pull out of what's happening and see that the patterns are not serving you. I'm really happy you did that
Chhaya Saini
@shimmythatsoul · 2:38
But now how every emotion is trying to teach us, like how you said, and that shame was actually teaching me that if I'm shameful, if I'm feeling that shame here, that means I'm much more valuable than this. And there's this higher self that is trying to wake me up and trying to guide me that, you know what? You don't belong here. You deserve better. And I hope you see that for yourself
Darrain …
@TheBriefOne · 4:10
And I'll forgive me if I didn't get the right names right, but a lot of people died during the time of 2000 and 22,023 in the bodybuilding community. And the first thing was, like, an actual seeing a video of Arnold Schwarzenegger talk about the importance of the love of the sport. And I was like, okay, I love what I do, but why am I so ashamed of always showing people my results?
Tonya Dewhurst
@BeKind2 · 4:58
I did, too. She told me if I didn't smoke a cigarette, that she was going to tell on me and that I would get in trouble for the entire thing. So when my parents found out, I remember feeling very embarrassed. And I remember my mom sharing the story with the neighbor lady. Embarrassed again. And I remember our punishment was to strip down to our panties, lay face down on our bed, and my dad beat us with a belt. I was humiliated
Tonya Dewhurst
@BeKind2 · 5:00
And he would start by saying, I've really noticed this week, but I've been at work, blah, blah, blah. Why did you do this? Why did you do that? Why? And it was a regular occurrence. I don't know where my mom was during that time. And we sat and cried, and I had no idea how long it went on. I was a kid, probably third or fourth grade. I felt extreme shame in that way
Tonya Dewhurst
@BeKind2 · 5:00
It's part three. Who knew? So it was just one thing after another in my childhood growing up. And then as I married, you know, and I. I started my life with my husband. I met him in college, and he was very verbally abusive to me and would say my brother, ten years younger, wanted me to go with him to fill out necessary papers and hang out with him for the day he was registering for college. And so it was a big day for him
Tonya Dewhurst
@BeKind2 · 4:52
And I've seen a few doctors because of the ER, and I've been in the ER three times since September. And I am not a person that runs to the doctor or wants medicine or whatever. And of course they tell me that's why I'm in the shape I'm in now, because what I've allowed in my life and I do, I own that. I realize now I didn't at the time, though
Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 0:50
I don't know the details, but it sounds intense, but it feels like every step of the way you're realizing that there's choices we make around how we internalize our story or how we live out loud and be proud. So thank you for navigating that here. It's an honor that you were able to sort of name your shame and talk about it
Mental Wellness Stories
@hope · 0:39
Doreen, I want to pop in here and thank you for your reflections on internalizing your shame and figuring out the narrative in your head that you can stop to be able to be proud of everything you accomplish and not compare and despair. But just be bold and celebrate who you are and all your accomplishments and all your numbers and all your stats. And be proud because it's just absolute waste of energy when we don't think about ourselves in the most benevolent of ways, it just eats in us
Darrain …
@TheBriefOne · 0:18
Anytime. As I speak about it, I heal. I think that's what makes it so beautiful. Take care. Thanks again