These are the following things that you will want to observe, see consistently as signs that they are ready to live on their own. And I say all of these things. And as I say this for those who are in this situation, I'm not saying this with judgment. I'm just saying it from the stance and the perspective I exist in right now. I don't want my child living with me. By the time he's mid 20s, by mid twenty?
Blair Redmond
@blairbearing · 2:07
Even though I know on the flip side that happens for some people, and that's exactly what they do, just make sure your children are mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially ready to move out. Ideally, staying at home would allow them to save money. It would allow them to kind of get acclimated with being an adult before they're actually just in an apartment on their own
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:55
And so it's really important to me that, and I've said this since he's been born, which is, I aim to raise a son that is a productive, contributing, positive member of society
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 4:56
He's going to have to go to school while doing his after school job, while listening to his boss while getting money and paying rent. I believe in that. Or if you don't want him to pay rent, then maybe take over your part of the phone bill or something like that. Give him responsibilities. Because once you know he's able to have responsibilities, that's that quantitative factor that's like, okay, he's done this
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 2:59
So you're doing the right thing. If I can just encourage you, like I said, because it's a concern. You're focused on it. He sees you guys as his role models and examples. He's going to be just fine. He's not going to be a kid living in your basement playing YouTube all day. I can decree and declare that if I will. So. Good question. I hope I offered some valuable points that were helpful
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 5:00
So we thought about that, and then we also thought about the grocery store. There's a chain of grocery stores here that is fairly nice. I don't know how far they extend up north, but it's called Harris Teeter, and there's locations near both of our homes
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 2:21
You. I want to add as well that a huge kudos to you and even more so your niece. Because oftentimes when children lose a parent so young, my heart is heavy and it goes out to them because it's losing a parent at any age is tough. And like I said, I can't remember if it was in my original swell or on a different swell. I am so grateful that I was in my mid to late 30s by the time I lost my father
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 2:17
He lost his dad when he was an adult, I think, like in his 30s, like he said, but he still has his mother and still depends on his mother for a lot of stuff. I said, well, you've got some nerve when you have your mom cooking for you and you use her washer and dryer for your laundry, you have some nerve to talk about a 20 year old who no longer has her mom
Kitha Larie
@chitchatwithkk · 4:51
Hey, JL, thanks for the invite. I can definitely understand because you want your child prepared, but the way that you speak and the way that you carry yourself and the way that you are confident in you, he will be prepared. Children. Sometimes children do stray away from their parent ways, but we raise them, and they learn things by not only what we tell them, but what they see, because they see a lot more, more than they tell us
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:05
I see great things occurring for him, and I know that he is on the right track. Thank you also for sharing about how your daughter is thriving and growing and learning about herself and how you and the tribe that you've created are instilling in her the importance and value of responsibility, accountability, and consequences, both positive consequences and consequences of opportunities, negative consequences, et cetera. And that's the part that's key. And that's, you know what someone told me when I got pregnant
Blair Redmond
@blairbearing · 0:52
You. Thank you, JL, for responding. Your response was perfect, as always. I mean, 24 25. Yeah, like, you picked up what I was dropping and I already. I don't want to say I assumed, because you shouldn't make assumptions, but I had an idea based on how you you run things over there. So I love that. I love that for you. I love that for your son
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 3:29
So we're sadly not in a position to guide anyone else because we haven't even guided ourselves. Right. So it's quite a conundrum. But yeah, at the end of the day, I think everyone has to figure out what makes sense for their child and what parenting is going to look like for them. But for me, I really despised the anchoring of success around career and titles, as opposed to, hey, are you happy? Hey, what does joy look like for you?
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:49
For me personally, as a parent, I want to create a window of time for him to set goals and achieve them and save and do all of the things that he needs to do to look like hallmarks of success for him. And as a hallmark for success for me, selfishly, as a parent, I want to in my lifetime
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 1:53
You have who you are. Be a positive value, add to the world that then gets exemplified in what you do. But yeah, no more time to tell for folks to figure out. Talk to you soon
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 0:17
You. Hi. I just had to come back and add one additional comment. Thank you for sharing the photo. What an adorable, I mean, completely adorable little guy. He is so handsome. Thank you for sharing a photo of your handsome prince
Natasha Nurse
@DressingRoom8 · 0:42
You're trying to make me have a great day. Thank you so much. Isn't he? He's just so yummy. He's delicious. He's. He's cutesy in his bootsy, as I like to tell him. And he's also. I don't know if you're a fan of. Oh, gosh. I always forget her name, like, whenever I need to say it, which is absolutely absurd. She's one of the most famous plus size models
