Although I know it is very tough for an introvert. Excuse me? Introverts such as myself at the tender age of 38 years young, wanting to find friends to hang out with. And then my other issue is, sorry, female is not the correct term to use. My lady friends like a lady friend. That is a lady friend. Right? Because I have a bad habit of attractive women I speak with. I'm like, okay, so let's hook up
Finley Ave
@finnave · 4:18
When I go to those, like, I do not talk and I just am worn out by the end of it because I'm like, yeah, overwhelmed, I'm an introvert, but, yeah, I have faith in you. I think you are very entertaining to listen to. So people are going to grasp onto that and the right people are going to see the light in that and want to pursue a relationship like a good friendship in that or a relationship
Greg Dickson
@ElasticBD · 3:38
The friends I had before I got married, after I got away from them for a while, I realized just how dysfunctional and it was and that people Ave basically friends with me because of the stuff we talked about in my coaching background. That's why people were friends, trying to figure their lives out and figure things out. But those aren't really friendships. Or are they? We help each other out. It's just really freaking weird time. Yeah
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:49
I did not even think about dating, but where I'm living at now, I have since dated and had some women over here and I was even going steady with a lady at the time and I was just not mentally ready for it. I thought I was though, man, there's so much build up towards that. So much emphasis I was placing on. I just need this puzzle piece and my life will be a lot better. And it wasn't
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:25
Mr. Dixon, thank you for taking the time to listen and respond to my swell. And you bring up some great points that affect social life life in these modern times. That of course, being the pandemic. You know what's so strange though? For me, it didn't affect my social life at all. If anything, it reinforced what it has always been
And so I think about being boring and just not having a social life per se, how that can actually bring ourselves some awareness if maybe it's a balance that we need to create. Because I think for me, I have to create a balance. I get drained, but then I seek people. But I'm afraid so. It's like this fear as well that's instilled in me because of maybe past traumas of certain folks, maybe a number of folks
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:58
It definitely makes me reconsider what aspects of social life are and what we value because it could be different things we value. There could be some people out here who have tons of friends but they still feel like they don't have a social life. It's not enough and that's a whole different thing within itself. But for me it definitely felt like I had way more friends when I was a teenager than now because I had school to fall back on. I had sports to fall back on
It's so interesting that you mentioned the opposite sex. And I just wanted to add I have struggled with friendships mainly when it came to either the same sex. But I noticed there was like this feeling of being in competition. Not that I wanted to be in competition, but I noticed there was a lot of comparisons or just people wanting to compare what they have with someone else that maybe lacks what they have
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:09
It just seems more formal to say, but for some people it's not. But anyway, yeah, it's interesting. A man myself being friends with the lady there's a certain freedom in being able to speak that I don't know. I guess sometimes it could be perplexed when it's two women having that dynamic. Do you find as you have gotten older it's a bit easier to form bonds with women? Or has it just always been the same for you?
But because of that, we can come together basically as one. Obviously, what I mean by that is that we're all part of this part of this life. Yeah. I just wanted to share that. And I hope that answers your question. If not, let me know. But great conversation
Darrisha Daniel
@Dee94 · 2:24
But sometimes it's like if you want someone to be interested in you, you got to show some interest in them and not just in your kind of desolate lifestyle. Yeah, I don't know. It's interesting to me how a lot of men can wind up in this sort of situation of just like endless mindless entertainment and just like napping and being okay with that sort of mundane lifestyle while others can just be like, looking for that excitement, looking for that rush. I don't know
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:42
It's just the adulting side of me has been so focused on responsibilities and s*** like that that I kind of put fun socializing on the back burner. Not even something I thought I was supposed to Ave as an adult. Even though friends I know they're going out all the time and stuff like that and doing extracurricular activities with their friends, but that seems like something I watch more in movies and TV shows than that being my real life
Darrisha Daniel
@Dee94 · 1:01
I'm very much so. Like, I get my energy from being outside and being around people. So, yeah, it's hard for me to kind of relate. To be honest, I don't think about it so much. I'm just like sometimes I'm out being social. Sometimes for weeks on end, I'm in the house and just, like, chilling, sipping wine, watching TV and doing whatever I want to do. Yeah
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:27
So there will be times where I would want to go out and do stuff but a lot of the times I would just be indoors and that caused a bit of a rift. But I do find as I'm getting older I am wanting to kind of go out a bit more. I was just thinking to myself today actually that I wanted to start walking more for exercise as well as getting out because I haven't done that in a couple of years
Finley Ave
@finnave · 2:34
But I think it also molded me later on in life as well. And I think for your self care thing, self care can look different for everyone. So it's not a one size fits all. But I do think finding the balance of like staying home or. Yeah, not staying home all the time and finding the balance of going out and having that social interaction is important. Just like you're saying, yeah, you're going to find it, you're going to get there
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 1:02
So that's what I'm trying to do and best of luck to you as well. And hey, as introverts, we're going to be all right because we have all that energy stored up to where when we do decide to use it for good, no one will be able to tell the difference from us and the rest of the people in the world
Kyle Crossman
@kylecrossman · 4:01
If you don't get along with someone that you meet, you never have to see them again in your entire life. Or if you do get along with them, maybe you guys are going to be friends for life. And every new experience that I've put myself in and gone out of my way to push myself out of my comfort zone, I've always been like, wow, that was such an amazing experience. I'm so glad I did that. And also I've been lucky
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:39
Kyle, thank you for taking the time to not only listen to every individual post shared on this swell, but also a response. Yes, thank you for your response as well. The extrovert speaks and I am listening. Mindset is everything. That is very true. Definitely. I have been in a struggle of sorts with mindset in matters of socializing to a degree that what I have been doing has not been working for. I am wanting something different
Eric Alan
@E.Octimino · 0:45
I $50 an hour. Come over, we'll smoke some bumps and play Monopoly. And yeah, I mean, s***, if you want to pay me $50 for an hour, if you live around me, I'll come over and play Monopoly with you. Just make sure you bring some lead
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 1:21
So yeah, I doubt I'll be paid for friendship. And I don't smoke weed, any drugs, any alcohol. None of that is probably why I don't have friends. I don't do recreational drugs. I'm just a boring old SAP that has a fondness for art, creativity and expression through the mind into hot takes that the internet pre these days. But thank you so much for contributing to this swell
Eric Alan
@E.Octimino · 0:16
Well, s***, I'm already, like, halfway there. I already left and everything. I guess I'll just turn around, go back to my house where I came from. I need some gas money, though
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 0:38
Yes, Eric. Unfortunately for you, my friendship has no monetary incentive. But perhaps you can create and only fans and charge for a fee to be friends with men and women. And just then you could fill up that gas tank. But until then, keep on trucking or pedaling with your feet as though you were Fred Flintstone. Either way, you got to get from A to B. Right