I want to bring the conversation of Scapegoating to the Swell community to talk about it. It's come up in a few conversations and sometimes I don't understand the meaning of it. Cross culturally,do we all think about scapegoating the same way, so I wanted to have a conversation with you about it. So to lead the conversation, I've invited Zohar Berchick to join us because she was one of the conversations I was having when the word came up
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 0:49
So from your perspective, from where you sit as a therapist and as a teacher, what does scapegoating mean and how do you square it with our understanding of what bullying means? And is it important to make a distinction or not so much? Just my first question. Thanks
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 5:00
I think that similar bullying is often a focus on a behavior and scapegoating, the focus is more societal. But I think similar group dynamics underline both and both are a way in which rather than sitting with discomfort and complexity and vulnerability we essentially spew out a lot of hostility towards hostility towards someone who someone or a group who somehow represents everything we don't like about ourselves or anything that we don't like about our situation. One last thing I would say is the term scapegoating came from the Bible
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 1:07
So from an historic perspective and also you can run up to today's situations if you want to look at that. But I love to kind of root this in Scapegoating throughout history. One or two examples you can give us that can really crystallize for those people who don't understand the impact Scapegoating has on a society. If you can help us, that would be great. So that's my second question
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 4:46
And very quickly, all the fear and all the unknown of what this is and why this is happening got channeled into, AHA, this is something the Jews are doing, and therefore, if we get rid of the Jews, we'll get rid of the problem. So they're the two examples that come to mind
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 0:42
And my third question, and then I'll open this up. It has to do with the psychology of scapegoating. And I think you and I touched on this when we spoke, and you're in such a good position to talk about it. What's the psyche around this? Why do people scapegoat? What's the deeper story, whether it's a group of people or one person?
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 4:45
So by the time we reach adulthood, we've already developed a series of concepts around who we are and what our place is within our various contexts. And there will be a lot of aspects of our experience that don't have room within that idea of who we are or who we should be. And we push those out of our conscious awareness. We push them down. We essentially disown those aspects of self
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 4:16
What that brings about though in follow up is that that relief is very short lived and the rules of the group have just been set. What has been established is that if you're different enough you might be next. And so it brings increased conformity. And so the more and more there is an external punishing of someone who steps out of line, the greater the group conforms to itself and it becomes scarier and scarier within this group to step afoot wrong. So we see that a lot in school
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 4:44
And as a person who facilitates groups and training groups, we learn a lot about what's referred to as Tuckman's model of group development which is that a group goes through stages of forming, storming norming and performing. There are quite a few models that speak to that particular trajectory. But when you facilitating a group, what you're doing is you're acknowledging that there's a collective energy that is expressing itself through the through the group and you're working with it in a very deliberate way
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 4:05
You. So what's happening in a group situation is that the groups come together for a shared purpose but they're not able to work together towards a shared purpose until they've become cohesive as a group. And becoming cohesive as a group is no straightforward thing. They first need to actually form into a cohesive group and then work as a group towards that shared purpose
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 4:43
If I don't share my vulnerability with you, when you share your vulnerability, if I don't meet you in a place of courage and vulnerability, I leave you with a burden of helplessness. Including my helplessness and including your helplessness. And I feel good about myself. Right? So this is actually a hidden way in which we scapegoat as a group. But often what happens in a group is that the group can't tolerate
Zohar Berchik
@whats_inaname · 2:49
And even if it doesn't fit that story and express all your unprocessed shadow stuff, all the unprocessed things you don't want to face within within your Western guilt attribute that to someone outside of yourself that looks other enough that's similar white passing but looks other enough to off flowed all that unaddressed shame onto there's my two BobsWorth. So now that I'm posting this, Deborah, I have to say I don't feel very comfortable with having posted any of this. But there's my vulnerability
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 2:59
These rallies that are going on that don't quite make sense to me about people that are latching onto sort of hating Zionism and it's so disconnected from who they are, but for some reason, they chose this. This is the flag they wave hatred of Zionism and pro everything that has been pushing down the Jewish way of life for thousands of years. I'm not conflating two issues. I no longer say that I am