I try to regulate my discussions. I try to regulate the environments that I'm in because I'm aware of my triggers. Are we all aware of our triggers? And if we are aware of our triggers, are we regulating them? Are we managing them appropriately? I find that in my personal relationships, it's easier for me to identify someone else's flaws and give advice on how they can improve their flaws because it shines the light on them and leaves my flaws and trauma in the darkness
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 2:08
And also when something is confronting me that feels confusing instead of kind of being a Mack truck and figuring it out immediately, allowing myself to be washed by the confusion so that I'm really deeply understanding of it and then I can choose my actions to move forward. And that to me is also something that comes with maturity. To not think that things that happen to me are not creating a victim inside of me but they might be happening for me
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 3:48
Hey, thank you so much for this. This is really good. I will say that I did not grow up seeing emotions expressed on a regular basis. I didn't grow up seeing either of my parents cry. I didn't grow up hearing my parents talk about how they felt about something. I grew up in an environment where things would happen and we just kind of swept it under the rug and kept on pushing. And that's how we lived our lives
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:09
I love, love, love this topic because it is so important the ability to have a pretty decent level of emotional intelligence starting with oneself. Because if you don't have it for yourself, it's really, really challenging to it for other people and it really doesn't make sense to have it for other people and not have it for yourself. It's like, come on, you got to fill your own bucket first
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 4:21
My pastor's wife, my first lady, she always says that our emotions are a gauge and not a guide. And so when my emotions are trying to rise up and this goes with the self regulating part, then I know that I need to begin to pray and ask God to help me, especially if it's a negative emotion, if it's a positive emotion, I go ahead and experience it