Couch session -9 - surrender
Happy Saturday, everybody, I'm so excited for the comedy Couch. This week, we have some amazing guests. And today's topic is surrender. Guys, tell me about surrender. Is there a time in your life you've ever had to surrender
So, oh, my God, surrendering to not being in front of the camera again. This sounds like champagne problems, and I'm very grateful to have any work, but you can do both. You definitely can. I leave set and I go to a comedy show at night. I might have to be later on the comedy show, but you do it. I've had to audition backstage in between game shows. I've had to put myself on tape
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 2:05
Oh, man, I feel like I had about an entire year of needing to surrender. My 2019 was a huge, just total life upheaval. And it was a lot of honest. I can't comprehend how this is happening. It's like you're in bizarre world. And I found myself just really having to trust the universe. And it turned out it was both the worst year of my life and the best year of my life
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:55
Good morning, Lesley. Oh, my gosh. What a great topic. Honestly, I feel like surrender can encompass so many things. But when I hear surrender, the first thing I thought of was like, it took so so much feeling of surrendering, fear to come out to Los Angeles, like, I grew up in this super small town, and you had to choose between a weekend of sitting in the Applebee's parking lot or sitting in the Walmart parking lot
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:35
Oh, it's time to say goodbye when it's not something that, like, you're really fighting for. There's a difference between being like, oh, this is hard. I don't want to do this anymore. Versus, like, oh, this actually is like hurting me. This is affecting my mental health. This is affecting my soul. I hate it here. So honestly, it's time to step back and leave when things don't nurture you anymore
I love that, Brighton, because as cliche as it sounds, if you don't fail, you don't learn about yourself and you're so you're just so inspirational because you put a million percent effort into everything you do. As far as I can see
Oh, my God, Danielle. I would sit in any parking lot with you. You're the funniest human being I've ever met. But what a great analogy. It's just deciding what parking lot you want to sit in
Jacqueline Marfuggi, you're so talented. I'm always amazed by how multifaceted you are. And I think it builds character to do a lot of different things. Like you're like the dream camp counselor. I want to take class with you, but I got to get motivated
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:52
And half these people in this room look like me, what is going on? So I think it's also important to talk about surrendering your expectations to what this industry is going to be and being okay with seeing where life takes you and also learning that this industry is not going anywhere. You can always come back and do great things. And just because you surrender this expectation in your mind at 18 doesn't mean you're not going to come back at 28 and literally be a star
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 1:24
And I'm a bit of a little bit of a control freak, and I can only control me, and I can only change me and fix me as much as I can know that if my family ate better or if people you love, hey, if you went to therapy, you would be a lot happier, and our relationship would be better. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink. So just worry about yourself
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:37
So I'm like, I'm not going to get this. No, that's not going to happen. No. And then they're like, oh, yeah. No. It's you and I what? So that's just what the world. That's just totally what the world is. The whole world is just, like, about surrender. You're so right
I'm working on a game show and also trying to plan a wedding. So I sit backstage and just Google photographers and bands and all the things. It's in Jersey, and I just have been getting notes from everyone. Just a straight up week full of no emails not available. And then yesterday, there was one makeup artist that was like a reach again. I know this is champagne problems. It's just an analogy. Who I was like, I'm never going to get him
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 0:12
First of all, Congratulations. Oh, my God. Shut up, Riley. Shut up. I love you so much. Shut up. Congratulations on your engagement. Oh, my God. Riley, you are in a swell talk right now
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:54
I want it to just be done. And everything is great, which is crazy, because we live in a city where you're stuck in traffic 99% of the time. So I guess now I understand why those a******* that go up on the shoulder and try to pass everybody because the line doesn't apply to them
I think my parents loved him more than my brother and I, but, yeah, we never, ever thought we'd love anything as much as we did that dog. So surrendering to something that you don't think you're going to be into sometimes surprises you because you legit was the most foiled family member in the Marfuggi household. So, yeah, get a dog. Hi, Riley
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:14
I'm needing to surrender to my deep, deep jealousy that both of you have had dogs. I love dogs so much. And I need my landlord to surrender to us. Getting a dog immediately
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 1:33
So all the knows that you think are just the end of the world will always turn out to be exactly what you needed. There. I said it. I got it out. Done. My dog didn't bark. Could show people
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:29
You know, when people say stuff and you just have to audibly, go, oh, that just happened to me, like, alone in my house. When you said that I was just like, oh, that's it. I am obsessed with that. I love that too. And I can totally relate to you on, like, a traumatic year. But what I found is, like, for better or worse, some of the best friendships in your life are born from trauma. Yay
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 1:17
They say that the span of the universe has already taken place and everything that's already happened and everything that will ever happen is all simultaneously happening at once
I touched a little bit about accidentally letting out a fart in front of my fiance for the first time. Very traumatic for me. We don't really talk about farts in my household. Apparently, a lot of people do, and it's super funny to people. So surrendering to the fact that it's funny people, fart, it happens. And you just have to go with it. Was such a big step in 2021. Have you guys ever done that?
And so I've outgrown a lot of my childhood friendships, and I feel like that's been a process of surrender, like a very bittersweet process. I know in the beginning I was very resistant towards it. But relationships are funny. You grow apart. You come back together, Asher. Sometimes you don't. Yeah
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:20
Oh, my God. Hi. Welcome. I love that you've been listening to this craziness. I feel like going back to what we're talking about. We've talked about so much like deep, philosophical s***. We've talked about trauma bonding. People are going to come onto this and be like, oh, my God. Ladies, who hurt you, everyone
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 2:18
It's so much easier said than done when you're in it. And you just want to go back to the heyday of when it was so perfect for you and who you were at that time. But if you think about it, you're not the same person that you were when you were a teenager or you're not even the same person that you were yesterday
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:07
Honestly, I'm going to live my whole life like Riley the dog. When my tail no longer suits me, I'm over it
Honestly, I feel like I changed so much and so fast. And I think that's the reason why I can't hold a relationship for more than two years, because just a different person. And I'm like, I don't know, it's such an issue. Why do I have to change? I like, I want to change, but it's like, you can't make people change with you. I mean, it doesn't suck
Isn't that the constant battle Cissy knowing you want to change, but also wanting to be okay with not changing. I've been battling that lately, too. Like a Demi Lovato song came on about loving yourself. And I was like, That's not me. Why can I give love so freely, but not to myself
Sissy. Totally get it. Also, are you a Gemini? I'm only asking because I am and I feel like I'm constantly changing, can't make a decision to save my life. And yeah, I'm like, no one can keep up again. Justice for Jim. Nice. Also, team Riley
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 1:52
But you're ultimately going to be going in the same direction. And that's honestly why so many relationships don't work out is because people are constantly changing. And a lot of times you just change and you start veering away from each other. So don't ever forget about your superpower that you are constantly evolving. And this is why I don't have any tattoos
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:08
Guys, I really appreciate that. It took us less than an hour to get to what Astrological sign are you? I'm obsessed with this group of people
I want to thank everybody for joining me today. As always, it was a ton of fun. Keep on swelling? Keep on talking? Keep on connecting thank you so much for coming
Danielle, I'm obsessed with you and all of you guys tell us your signs. Gemini with a Scorpio moon, Leo rising. Yep. Also, Leslie, I want you you to surrender to taking my classes. Actually, this isn't like an ad or like a sponsored post, but if you guys want, I can comp all of you. I teach a high cardio dance fitness class called Piojam, and I have a Zoom class tomorrow at 09:00. A.m
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 0:08
Thanks, Leslie, for putting this together. I love you all with my whole heart. I hope you realize you are now my best friends and call me every five minutes
Danielle Williams
@xdanielley · 0:21
Alright, this is an Aries Sun Aries Moon Scorpio ascending signing off. You guys are amazing. I had so much fun. Leslie, thank you so much for having me. Jacqueline, I am 100% in to take a class of that sounds amazing. You guys are also awesome. Let's stay connected. Yay bye have a great day
Brighton Asher
@brightonasher · 0:33
Are we all about to be friends on Costar now? Cancer PISCES moon Libra rising just feelings on feelings on feelings pain knower love, knower happiness better best friends sadness homies we go way back just feeling all the feelings and Jacqueline, yes, please. I want to be in your class even if it's not A. M. I'll surrender the heck out of that morning to dance like a pop star with you. Thank you
Oh, yes, we are Brighton about to be friends. Leslie, thank you so much for putting this together. This is so cool and so fun. And guys, if you do want to take the class, just DM me at Jacqueline Murphugi on its Instagram is probably the best way to do it and let me know and I'll send you the link. Have a fabulous day, everyone. Bye