Couch Session 5 - regret
Hey, guys, grab a cup of coffee. It is time to talk with this week's Amazing Comics and join Leslie on the couch for session five
Today the topic I want to encourage us to explore is regret. What have you had regret over in your life? But funny. Hear my dog in the background. He regrets that's a lot
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:37
Hi, Leslie. This is Cheryl Lee Scott. Wow. That is a great topic, and it's something that I am working on each and every day to try and not regret all of the best bad things that I've done. Bad is such a weird word too. I'm trying to see the other side of it and learn from all of the quote, unquote mistakes that I've made and try to incorporate, incorporate them into a positive. Oh, God
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:23
If it's someone I like, they're giving it it's for a promotion or for the or art or whatever. I want to hand it back. I want to hand it back to them because where am I going to put it? I have nowhere to put it now. You say, well, that doesn't sound like regret. It is. I don't put on a car, God forbid on a car. I know there's someone right now saying I have stickers on my car
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 1:30
I regret walking out of a standup show that I did for a bunch of gang bangers in an alcoholic recovery room with a friend of mine who puts is on these free shows and I walked out before he finished his set. I was with my best friend and my ex boyfriend and I did like a mic drop. I did my first eleven minute set with him and I was really kind of rude to him and the other guy who used to write jokes from Rodney Dangerfield
jonathan hayes
@jonathanhayes · 1:15
But I did sell those shares, and I ended up buying a really cool new putter for my golf game anyway. But my biggest regret was this Indian takeout food I had once, and I don't want to get too graphic, but that is the kind of regret that we also all can really feel you're in for a nice evening. Nice chicken tikka masala
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 0:40
Cheryl, I got a Cheryl Lee Scott. Hi. I gotta say Cheryl Lee Scott. That sounds quite a bit like a testimony before Congress. That was very vague. And it feels like this started out as like, oh, let's say something. We funny. Regret cookies. And then I was Mike, Wait, Cheryl Lee Scott has got something she's hiding. All I'm saying is, I've never seen Cheryl Lee Scott and Lee Harvey Oswald in the same room
And I love what you said about pre regret, because something about stickers is so ephemeral they're only pristine when they're in the sheet. Once you take that sticker off, once you put it on that binder, once you stick it on your laptop, it's almost like a death sentence for that sticker. But anyway, no wonder I love you so much. I'm a sticker too
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 0:50
Jonathan, this is the Internet. Get graphic. I want to know what happened. Tell me what it was. Tell me the moment I often have this question. There are certain rumors and stories that people tell urban Legends, and I often want to question severely about them. Is one of them is eating bad food. And that night it becoming. I mean, I feel like it takes a long time to have the bad food. I might need graphic details to believe you
And we call it a why did you do that? And I then if you don't have the memory of the thing that went wrong, you won't even remember the event. So it's always good to have these regrettable moments for comedy and for life
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:35
Hi, Mike Phallic. Well, I may have in a past life killed JFK. My dad believes the CIA killed him and Marilyn Monroe. I I was not alive when JFK was killed, but I do believe in past lives. And I'm an intuitive psychic healer. And perhaps I should do a past life regression on myself and find out whether or not I am Lee Harvey Oswald
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:48
Leslie, my friend. I have made no bones about me constantly wanting to preserve my childhood. But Funnily enough, I did not live in a home that would have encouraged stickers. I really didn't. I did not have stickers surrounded by video games in my office right now and I eat cereal out of a bag and watch cartoons every day. I am not living my childhood. That's how I exist, but I was not a stickerless home. I was a sticker. Ous
My question for you, Jonathan Hayes, is When's the last time you played golf? And can you buy your wife a gift with a golf putt? Yeah, you should. Hayes kept those Apple stocks, I'm guessing. But you know, you can't you some people think you got to keep going back to the same restaurant for India. And some people say, switch it up. I say, stay tried and true. I go to a place on PECO called Taj Mahal
For most things, I regret that I didn't turn in my midterm assignment on time. Sorry, doctor teacher. I regret that I still haven't done it. I regret that I'm thinking about still not doing it. And I regret that I'm such a bad student because these teachers deserve better. But also, sometimes I regret even going to the school because it's online period. Also, I regret that this isn't a speech conversation, so I regret saying period in that moment
jonathan hayes
@jonathanhayes · 1:06
Now, how do I get that off? Then you Peel it off and you have half a sticker stuck on the back of your bag or whatever. That is really interesting. I would like to really dig deeper into this sticker phenomena and what it means. Oh, I'm sorry. Do you like stickers? I don't even know who I'm talking to. That's a great question, too. And we may regret this later, because that's the theme looking forward to more interesting conversation
And I feel like the whole point of being a comedian is kind of to get over that and to cup it. And honestly, my biggest fear with the comedy is sharing the pain. So underneath it all is the pain. But what do I regret? I regret hiding. I feel like in somewhere I feel like in a past life, I was a Jew in 1942, and in this life, I don't regret being Jewish. But in this life, I continue to hide
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:46
You can't even hear what I'm saying. And then I just went and skied off by myself and didn't talk to him the rest of the day. And it's like, I can be such a b****. And I know that we all have it in us to be nasty. But at the end of the day, life is short. Got to live it and be nice. I'm trying it's hard
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:26
You guys, I did just buy some nail stickers this morning at CVS, and I have no idea why. Because I have the worst nails on the planet. I bite the sides of my nails. Guess I'm going to have to use them on my daughter. I don't know why, but maybe it was because I was intuitive from my psychic abilities that we were going to talk about stickers today
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:54
Just curvaceous platinum blonde Mike in 60s era. Mike, the CIA outfit they wore back then, like the Turtleneck and all that stuff. And she's in a day in Texas. She's got to go to Texas, but she can't be her. She's got to be secretive. And so she's got that cool, rough and tumble kind of look, Mike, she looks like Jason Bourne when he's shopping in some market somewhere, some open air, bizarre
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:54
Hi. I just want to say Hi to Abby. I miss you. I loved hearing your voice here. I love hearing your voice. I regret being mean to myself, especially in high school and College and telling myself that I wasn't skinny enough and stuff like that, trying not to be mean to myself because I realized that when I'm nice to myself, I can be nicer to other people. But yes, Abby, you're right
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:06
I'm certain it's shortening my lifespan and vascular health. Or I'm certain I'm going to worry about that. What is a gStick? And what are we doing for the people sleeping on their sides
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:00
Abby, I first of all, comedy is, yeah, I don't know about the theory on if it covers up shame. Every comedian I know is pretty shameful and miserable. But I am really like, I love that you shared an actual regret that's that's awesome. That's really cool. I have thought about that scenario, though for so long. Just how many cigarettes and joints and things we used to just decide based on whatever judgment we made
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:28
Hey, Mike, I like what you said about coming up with a movie with Marilyn as a CIA agent. Supposedly, she grew up in the neighborhood that I live in in West La. And she's buried just 2 miles away from me in Westwood. My dad went to Van EI's High School, where she went for a short time. So let's write the movie
jonathan hayes
@jonathanhayes · 0:55
It's interesting that you're into Cults. And my favorite band when I was in College was the Cult, and they had some really kickass tunes. And anyway, the guy who lived in the dorm next to me, he was in Zacoe. We used to jam out and have so much fun. And Mike, then fast forward a couple of years, I wrote a song and got it recorded with some band guys
Atticus, your regrets are making me think about something. Can we look at our regrets and what we regret and make it into a positive? Like if you're not someone who's a student or enjoys being a student, don't be a student or if you want to change, challenge a teacher, or what a teacher says. Being a person who challenges the teacher is an asset to any class
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:28
Starfighter down. Who are you? Your photo looks like you're a 25 year old guy, but you sound like you're like 55 year old cigar smoking aficionado. Sophisticated man in a smoking jacket. I think you have a smoking jacket in your current profile picture. Anyway, you have a fantastic voice. Love it
I Hayes to say it. What the h*** is this? I want to go back to cave painting, that's all. I mean, I guess it's nice not to be seen. That's the one nice aspect of this thing. But I regret how fast everything's going, even though it's in the ether, it's just going to kill everything. I regret that things aren't simpler
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:38
Jonathan. Yes, that's awesome. I will tell you the one I know very little about music. No. Speaking of regrets, I have I don't have I don't know very little about music. I don't have the arrogance that other people have when their casual music listener like me and to be like, oh, I know so much about this band. So I get very intimidated by people who know stuff about music. And I kind of don't share my music knowledge
Abby, you wake up with regret. Listen to me and listen to me. Good. I love you so much because you're such a dichotomy. You make these amazing illustrations full of such levity and joyfulness. Yet underneath you are a Woody Fallek and level neurotic. So I think you need to embrace it
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:15
Oh, my God. Abby, my son. My tenyearold son was asking yesterday whether or not life would be better if we didn't have the Internet or cell phones. And it's like, it's a great question, you know, you know
And I regret just what an incredibly good person I am. Admittedly, I also regret the tooth on the dobbyhorn that I had before this conversation that could also be slowing me down. I regret really, that I don't understand what's happening with the stickers. Do we want stickers or do we not want stickers? Are you afraid of where to put them? Are you saying you don't know where to put them? Because I don't understand
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 1:14
Wait a second. Wait a second. Wait a second. Cheryl Cherry Garcia. Nondairy. Is it called My Kids freaking Love Cherry Garcia? I did not get into the Grateful Dead until a year and a half ago, when I started using weed. I was so anti. My exboyfriend got me high, and we watched a YouTube video of the Grateful Dead. I used to Hayes those bears. I was like, those hippy bears irritate the s*** out of me
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:13
I mean, some stuff is horrible, right? Like setting children on fire. I don't know. Does that happen? Probably. But yeah. Oh, my God. That made me laugh so much. I have a thing with comedy where I sometimes have a hard time knowing when an artist's true misery ends. And so either way, your intense despair over the Internet was incredibly funny to me. If this isn't funny, if you're in intense despair, sorry
Hey guys, a little swell tip. If you're responding to somebody in the thread, be sure to add them in the subject line of your swell. So when you press reply and make your swell, say it's to Cheryl Lee Scott, be sure to add her at Cheryl Scott with your answer. That way she knows to answer your swell. You guys are killing me today. It is so funny
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 0:55
I love stickers. I have nowhere to put them. Consult me on this. I have not. I don't have nice stuff. I have newer crappy stuff and so I don't want to put it on it to pretend there will come a time where my stuff sucks enough to. Well, that's not true because I'm looking at old game stations right now. A lot of them suck. I have some old N 64 controllers that are terrible. I'm lying to myself
It's true in terms of held on for years about quitting jobs, stopping things kind of as you were inching higher, getting better, it got harder. So you expected more of yourself. I noticed that with the art or not, with the comedy where you expect more from yourself. And then that's when you kind of have to be gentle. So as much as the shame thing is, I'm clawing my hands, Mike, I'm holding Mike a grapefruit for the life of me
Cheryl Lee
@cherylleescott · 0:19
You guys, I'm trying to keep up on doing the best I can. Sleeping on your side is good for you. You don't snore when you sleep on your side. And also I think when you sleep on your left side, it's better for some of your organs. Organs inside of your body. Not like the musical organs
jonathan hayes
@jonathanhayes · 0:28
Not sure how to do the at, but this is at Mike Phallic. Two things. One, Cherries Garcia is my favorite ice cream. No regrets there. And two, two. Who's Jerry Garcia? The h*** are you talking about? Throwing around that music knowledge like that? The h***
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 0:32
Oh, Jonathan, don't worry. I'll find you. No matter where you post. Put it in. I'm watching. What are the eyes? One of the eyes from Lord of the Rings. Hold on. I'm going to ask my. My girlfriend. You're somewhat recorded. What are the eyes from Lord of the Rings? Rings? What? What are the eyes? The eyes? The one that tipping looks at the Parliamentary robot. Counted for Jonathan
Oh, my God. Abby Schachner, I love you so much. And I want to see a cloud thumbs up in the sky today. As a good luck premonition. I was going to say harbinger because I always get harbinger and good things come confused. But I think a harbinger is a message of ill will correct me if I'm wrong, Abby. Just like everything else. Duality, duality, duality. I think in order to be highly happy, you have to have times of despair
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 0:57
See, you got positive there. This is how we get polliacies. This is how you were happy. Hated it. No, keep tripping over the bucket. Come on, clown. You know, sometimes people make fun of clowns. And I know that sometimes people will be like, oh, we've updated Clowns Jackass. Those guys went to clown school and all these different things. There's nothing wrong with slipping on a banana or getting your foot stuck in a bucket
But I'm sure I'll talk about it for the next 12 hours anyway. In terms of the stickers, I just want to find the box of my stickers. I got a box of stickers from second grade. The smelly ones, all that s***. I want to pull it out and smell the skunk. I'll pull it out and smell the pickle. Those are terrible. Those are the worst ones. I got grape in there. I got good stuff in there
All right. So I think we're at the part where everybody's in a cult now. I think that's what I'm getting. We're all in a cold now. I'm okay. We're in a cold now. I don't regret that. That's nice. And I think I gave Leslie Epiphany, so I don't regret that either. And also, Cheryl, Cheryl is quite complimentary. It should make me feel quite nice about myself, actually
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 0:22
Cheryl, I know it's good for me. I love it. All I'm saying is that the industrial bed industry is not making a bed for me. Hammock. Maybe hammock. Where's the high end hammock I can put in my house? I don't have two trees is in my bedroom. Where's the fluffy hammock I can put in my house that isn't resistant to bugs or whatever hammocks you put outside our it's
When my dad wins me the stuffed animal, I'm going to pretend to be fun getting all this scary Rickety ride that looks like it's going to kill me. How much of life is really us doing what we enjoy or us clowning or pretending that it's good. This is deep, man, you're great. I'll have you on the show anytime
jonathan hayes
@jonathanhayes · 0:52
And we sleep under a weighted blanket. But I am starting to regret using it because I don't know how it's possible, but I do believe I have sprained my ankle sleeping
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:05
Abby, you're an adult now. You have some amount of access to money. You Hayes. The ability to get debt is a better way. You can get a credit card and pay ten. You have money. Like when you're a kid, no one's gonna let you buy perfumes and the soaps you actually want want. We force soap smells on kids. I remember that was a big thing for me at some point
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:10
Again, this is what happens to artists. They get misinterpreted. I am. I am only saying clowns are great. I am not making a metaphor. I don't want to be interpreted as a great mind. I am saying tripping on a banana is funny. It's funny. The makeup is bad, but no one likes that. But falling on your face
If somebody walks into my room with some really strong perfume or even o de toilet, I'll actually hate them for the rest of their lives. So it's so interesting how smell affects people differently
mike fallek
@mikefallek · 1:17
John, you have a haunted blanket. Very clearly. This is an object from a witch. Okay, it just showed a blanket just showed up in your house. That makes you sleepy. That's literally a scene that happens in one of the Chronicles of Narnia movies. That's what happens, John. They give them a blanket and they fall asleep. You're being stalked by a witch. A real witch. You've got to get rid of the blanket