@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 4:09

Would you date someone who had you in the friend zone?

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Is it such a bad thing to be pulled out of the friend zone and now looked at as relationship potential or marriage potential? What say you, Swellcast? Have you ever been pulled out of the friend zone and given an opportunity to date the person you were once interested in? Or have you pulled somebody out of the friend zone and decided, okay, I think I want to date you now? What say?
@geo_rhymes
Nidhin George đź”·
@geo_rhymes · 4:14

@MsColes77

If it doesn't work out on a romantic level or if I'm not attracted to that person for any reason, I try and be as upfront as I can without coming across as too hard or too insensitive. And I try to tell the person that it's not working out on a romantic level and try to end it at that. I've always been surprised at how people jump from being unable to get into a family relationships to we can be great friends
@Royalcapability
Adriane
@Royalcapability · 3:14
You. Hi. Such a good topic. So I don't know of a time where I was put in the friend zone. However, I have and still do put people in the friend zone if they're not, like, dating material. I've had guys that tell me, if I if you don't want to be with me, if I can't be with you in a relationship, then I don't want to be your friend
@Her_Sisu
J.L. Beasley
@Her_Sisu · 4:48
And I think we went out on two dates after the second date, it was so horrific that I ended up not speaking to him for about a good three months. And then we happened to be at the same shopping center. He ran up on me and we started back talking again and I explained to him what didn't work for me in that dynamic. And then we agreed our friendship is more important to us and let's maintain that. And we did that
@GlennPriceMann
Glenn Mann
@GlennPriceMann · 2:48
So how is that sort of navigated? But I think the most important thing would be like, okay, why and why now? Did something happen? Is that person coming out of a bad relationship? Are they on a rebound and they're just lonely? So maybe that's why they're looking for they want to give romance a chance. Now did something happen? Did I win the lottery or something? Did something happen to make me all of a sudden seem appealing and attractive?
@Swell
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15

Welcome to Swell!

@ilovelucee
Luce Fonrose
@ilovelucee · 4:38
We'll be doing everything that we're not supposed to be doing because we're not dating, we're not talking, we haven't established anything. And then I tell you that I have feelings for you, and then you're like, oh, well, I don't feel the same way
@Andrea_Speaks
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 4:27

#friendzonedating

I think a lot of times we close ourselves off to possibilities that it could be something good, right? It could be. We don't know until we get into it. But I would say never close the opportunity to see if something could be lasting. Because again, if that's your friend and you could talk to them about anything, then you all should be able to say, you know what? This is working. Let's continue on. Or you know what? This is not working
@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:07

@geo_rhymes

Hey, Gio Rhimes, thank you so much for responding. I love the point that you made when you said just because we won't work out romantically doesn't necessarily mean that we're automatically going to be good friends. And I think that is so important because we just assume that we can be everybody's friend, even if we can't be with them romantically. But that's not necessarily the case
@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:10

@Royalcapability

I'm not talking about somebody that's just in the friend zone, but somebody that you were just like, no, now all of a sudden, this person looks like a possibility. Now this person looks promising to you when all this time you were like, but that certainly does happen. Kind of like these guys that hit you up in your inbox talking about they thought you were so fine all this time, they used to like you back in the day
@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:05

@Her_Sisu

Her do you go back to being friends, so to speak, or is that the end of family relationships, period? Because it didn't work out romantically. So, yeah, the whole back and forth will they, won't they? Maybe not. That can cause some awkwardness and some confusion if you don't really know what the boundary is here in terms of if we are in a romantic relationship and something doesn't work, what are we going to do?
@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 2:29

@GlennPriceMann

I don't want us to be together because we're both getting older and we're lonely, and we just need somebody to grow old with. I don't want to be like that at all. So thank you so much for this response
@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:19

@ilovelucee

They see love in a different light. They see life in a different light. And so whatever they did not see in you or whatever they overlooked in you may be a quality that they realize they need in their life right now, something they realize they've needed all along and just did not know how to identify it
@MsColes77
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 1:49

@AndreaSpeaks

Hey, Andrea, thank you so much for your response. I like what you said when you were talking about, don't close yourself off to the possibilities, because, you know, anything can happen. Anything can change. People change. People grow. They mature. They evolve. There may be something about you that's changed, that's made them see you in a more romantic light. Now
@Andrea_Speaks
Andrea Piggue
@Andrea_Speaks · 4:53

@MsColes77

And so he bet my friend that if he and I did grown folk stuff that I would want to keep coming back. And I told my friend, never like, he going to want me more than I want him, right? And so we ended up starting to talk, but we never did grown folk stuff, right? So we end up talking and getting to know one another. And I'm talking about we were spending time together just like three or four times out of the week
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