Now you want to control everything but you can't do it very next moment you are thinking why should I control, why should I bother about things that is happening? Why can't I live my life, why should I think about others? And the very next moment you are craving for a family. You're craving for love, you're craving for people around you want to get socialized and you are looking for people actually and again after a few minutes you want to be all alone