And so it wasn't about find somebody you think that's cute and go ahead and get married. It was about everything but that. It was definitely about the family, the class that you were in and things like that, like things of that nature. So many layers other than boy meets girl, boy likes girl, let's get married and hope it works out. So looking back, I would have appreciated an arranged marriage
I'm Indian, and so my parents were arranged. My grandparents were arranged. Many of my cousins were arranged. Many of them were not arranged. My first marriage was arranged. My second marriage was not arranged. My first marriage fell apart because my first marriage was not based on compatibility between charts. My first marriage was orchestrated, and it was a con. Basically, the guy was after a green card. Once he had the green card, he was out the door
Pand I seen this girl, and I think she took to me because I knew about Islam. And we started talking about his cousin Ali, the well beloved, who used his skill and prowess at war, holding his life cheap for a car so high. She had an arranged marriages, and I guess she thought as long as I was Muslim, which I really wasn't, but that they would go for it. Pand she gave me a phone number and I called her
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 1:49
I like when people are intentional about whatever we do. And when things are kind of fly by night, that's where I don't like it. But I like when people are very intentional and they have a plan and they put that plan together. So that's good. If you're up for a question, I wonder if you were pretty solid on the fact that you believe that if it's by birth chart, that is the only way it's going to work
But pageants, petilians, Teddy Hawkins Day, whatever you won't call it, dressed to the nines out trying to outdo each other for the sweet 16, but that's done and it's amongst our people and I don't agree with that. I don't agree with the inbreeding to keep that whole town light. But I'll tell you what, we wasn't allowed to go there. I was too dark to go there. My grandfather got shot, my mom's dad got shot
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 4:31
But at the same time, all the stuff that we thought mattered, how tall you are, do you got light eyes? What kind of car you drive. What does that matter? We just want a really good person to spend our lives with. And I'm there too, so I understand that. And it's like, if we could start out with that without the trial and error of trying to do it ourselves, why not just start out with that and grow in love?
Nidhin George 🔷
@geo_rhymes · 4:20
Are they attracted to me? And are there things in our life that we can work on? Are there things in our life that we cannot work on? And if I find that these aspects match, then I don't really care if the origin or the foundation comes from an arranged perspective or a love or a dating perspective. I hope that makes sense, and I hope I was able to add value to this conversation
Deidre Swain
@deidre-latrease · 1:06
You. I very much believe in arranged marriages, and I always have wished that my parents would have done one for me. I mean, it's not our culture. It's not how I grew up. It's not even where I came from. But it is still something that, if done properly, in the way pand, in the spirit that it's meant to be done in that I think could have benefited me
Well, if you ask me now, I'm like, Absolutely. These marriages work now. Do you think part of the reason these marriages work is because the couple is mature on my level right now when they're young and they go all in, or they just trust the parents in the process? You know what I mean?
Nidhin George 🔷
@geo_rhymes · 3:08
How important is it for you to be able to connect with that partner? On a deeper level, in terms of emotional connect, intellectual connect, in terms of life goals and visions, what they have in planned for their life, what they envision their future to be, does it align with you? What are their belief systems? What are their school of thoughts? And does that sit well with you?
Tanya Coles
@MsColes77 · 4:38
So arranged marriages have been the standard for a long time, and they still are the standard in a lot of cultures where families have conversations. When these children are little, when they're babies, when they're toddlers, and as they raise their children, they already know, my son is going to be marrying this young lady. I did see a young lady on YouTube that talked about getting married, pand
Angela Kaye
@AnngieKaye · 2:46
We made that our goal. And so we missed the mark when it comes to actually building family and respecting our elders, because you got to respect a person's opinion if they're going to match you up with a life partner. We also, I think, have lost the value of marriage if we ever had it. I don't know. I'm not the total history buff, but because I don't know. We are a capitalist society, right? We have the ability to make money