@DBPardes
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 1:59

When you’re the Subject - out loud or in a whisper - which is worse?

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To put it another way, have you ever had a situation where somebody talked about you overtly or in a more obfuscated way, but they really were talking about you in public, or if you had a situation where they talked about you in private and the work got back to you and what's more hurtful? What do you feel about it? I guess I'll be personal here and say, I think both are pretty hurtful

Hearts are always left out to hang

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@FryedOreo
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 3:22

When it’s friends, it hurts deeply for me.

Yeah, that's interesting. Interesting question. I've been in a situation where folks have attempted to talk about me in a subliminal way, but I just have a 6th sense that's my intuition kicks into major high gear when it comes to stuff like that, and I can kind of tell I can feel it in the air as it were, but sometimes it's not really my place because I don't have the issue. They have the issue
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@Shawn_Christy
Shawn Schepps
@Shawn_Christy · 0:44
I figure people talk about each other all the time anyway. So if someone wants to talk about me, they can knock themselves out and do it in private. I know my family, family talks about me. I know I talk about my family. My friends probably talk about me. I talk about my friends. I talk about politicians. Everyone talks about politicians. So having acknowledge. It not being a shocker that people talk about each other. I'm good with the private
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@bowie
Bowie Rowan
@bowie · 4:08

Agreement 3 - Don't Take Anything Personally

And she posted the question to us like, how would we feel if we were being written about, like in the way in which she was writing about this other person? And I felt very neutral towards it. And it's interesting because our other group members did it. They were like, no, I would never want to be written about in this way. That would be so scary
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@FryedOreo
Dewuan .
@FryedOreo · 4:51

Wise words @bowie

This went years deep into all these other social audio apps that I was oblivious to because I didn't have the problem. I didn't have the issue. This person did. And what made it more hurtful to this person was that other people didn't have this issue with me either, that he has. But one person says something enough to connect threads of pattern matching to where. Yes, finally, I'm not the only one. And that to me
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@DBPardes
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 2:06

@FryedOreo @bowie @Shawn_Christy

They did not reference me by name at all, but it was the first time somebody mentioned something we were involved with in a callous kind of laboratory kind of way, no soul, no love, just really alluding to a relationship that was just like, kind of I was a lab rat for someone's experiment, and it was just devastating. And it prompted me to really explore what was going on here
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@omaniblog
Paul OMahony
@omaniblog · 4:42
I've supervised people. I've managed people. I'm sure that everything I did in relation to them kind of being. Oh, Whoopi. Thank goodness we have Paul as our manager, but that's kind of a very easy thing I find to deal with. You make a decision, it's unpopular. You just deal with it. So I haven't had very much experience of communicating with people who don't like me
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@LadyO
Ophelia Johnson
@LadyO · 3:53
And I told her I just have other things going on. So I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you. But really, it made me realize that you can't really trust anyone. And now people talking about me behind my back is of no concern to me. Whatever you can't say to my face, then it doesn't matter what you say behind my back, because in the end, people are going to think what they want to think anyway
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@DBPardes
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 1:28

@LadyO @omaniblog

Wow. This continues to be a compelling conversation for me. Paul, thank you for your reflection. I'm glad you had a good life in terms of reflecting on this topic and affiliate really painful when you are in a situation where there's layers of pain and you make some good choices to spare people, I definitely am not immune to making bad choices and hurting people in my own careless way
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@omaniblog
Paul OMahony
@omaniblog · 3:17

@LadyO

And I think I heard you say, you don't trust people anymore. Who you thought was your friend did such a vicious thing to you, destructive. But that's one person who's done that to you. Now, the difference in my head, if you had a whole succession of people who are nasty to you, well, nasty is, I mean, nasty and the strongest meaning terms
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@ILY135
Bailey Biagi
@ILY135 · 0:15
What does intimate mean in the context of what you were asking? I didn't mean to cut you off, but I'm not quite sure exactly what you were meaning in the way that you use
@Swell
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15

Welcome to Swell!

@Shawn_Christy
Shawn Schepps
@Shawn_Christy · 0:32
And addendum to what I said previously on the subject, which is when my ex boyfriend would go to Vegas. I would tell him if you sleep with a hug Walker, I don't want to know about it. I'm sure he did. And that's why people can talk about me behind my back, to their heart's content. I just don't want to know about it
@LadyO
Ophelia Johnson
@LadyO · 4:28

@omaniblog Thank you for your kind words🙏🏾

And two, it's just you see someone as a friend and they would, actually. But then I found out later that she always lies about a lot of things. And I think that because she was a big liar or is a big liar. From my understanding, what I was told is that people didn't believe that anyway, because everyone saw me struggling through this divorce and getting on with it
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@DBPardes
Deborah Pardes
@DBPardes · 0:17

@ILY135 To suggest, hint, or insinuate something to someone.

Hey, Bailey, in this context, intimate means sort of to suggest or hint the meaning of something strongly without hang to actually use the word. I'll put the definition here that I got in Google as well for you. Thanks for your question
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