@Bendi_G
Benedict Garrett
@Bendi_G · 4:27

PDAs in India

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But it's nice to see couples enjoying each other, kissing each other, hugging each other, showing their love for one another out in public, in my opinion at least. And I know that when young people attempt to do it in places outside of places like McDonald, they're often harassed, if not by members of the public. But in a city like Mumbai is less common because people here are a lot more open minded and fear to do what they want

Why can’t young Indian couples express themselves publicly without being harrassed by the police? #pda #kissing #romance #sexuality #romance

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@Ketkiii3
Ketki Bansode
@Ketkiii3 · 3:06
I don't know what to do. Like what hope for them to when they just think that okay, it's normal, kissing is normal, couples holding hand is normal in the public area or something. Again, I would point it out that I'm hoping, hoping for the second most populated country is India. And I'm hoping that this will happen soon. Do you think this will happen soon?
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@Ketkiii3
Ketki Bansode
@Ketkiii3 · 0:31
And I would like to also add a point on that. India, a country who who wrote a book about sexuality, about intercourse, and one book called Kamasutra, is still not accepting casing in the 21st century. I mean, what the h***? You tell me. I five days
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@Bendi_G
Benedict Garrett
@Bendi_G · 4:03

@Ketkiii3

But equally, I think that sexuality is such an important and normal part of our human journey and our discovery and such a natural part of who we are and we should all be allowed to explore relatively openly. Obviously, not everything can be done in public, but showing some human affection, showing love towards another, is such a natural path of that expression of our love and affection for another
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@Tancy_0818
Tanishka Singh
@Tancy_0818 · 3:40

@Bendi_G

Thank you so much for talking about this topic. Like this is something that is something very shocking to me. Like I'm not saying this is the first time discovering this, but I got to know this probably around seven or 8th class and I was like, there's no way that's actually true. There's no way someone like the police will beat people up for doing PD or for kissing or being closed. That just sounds stupid and I was wrong
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@Binati_Sheth
Binati Sheth
@Binati_Sheth · 4:58

@Bendi_G It is a sad situation. Change is a two way street. Only one side wants change. ☹️

Like, there are parks where couples hang out behind bushes and stuff to kiss each other, get handsy and whatnot. And uncles and aunties specifically make it a point to snoop around in bushes and be like, if there are kids kissing and touching, if there are teens or couples basically getting cozy, we're going to have to separate them. Right? So I've never seen police called on people, but yes, I've read about stuff like that all the time. And it's not illegal
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@hansa
happy kewlani
@hansa · 2:11

@Bendi_G

Like as you said, that they are adults and there is a right to express and public deserve affection is also kind of expressing one's love for each other. But the main question is the people of India, the society is not ready to accept things in the new way. Like they are very radical minded people and if they see someone doing something which is not acceptable they just feel ashamed and embarrassed
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@Shaz
Shaz
@Shaz · 1:01

@Bendi_G Moral policing at its best! People are convinced that they're doing good by telling off the younger people to "behave properly"!😅

Thank you so much for this post. I think it's a wonderful conversation starter. I remember posting something similar to this, where they are okay with PDAs when it's like much older people in their seventies or eighties, but they're not okay with the people who are younger. I think it has to do with a cultural mindset which is more conservative and the biggest sprinkling of modern policing other people. And I think you're a lot more vulnerable when you're younger
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@Bendi_G
Benedict Garrett
@Bendi_G · 5:00

@Binati_Sheth

And accepting that that's the only way and not asking what, could we also have pistachio it? Could we also have coffee flavor? Could we also have raspberry flavor? In a pluralistic society, you would also expect to see those many other things and moving forward. The ice cream chocolate will say, well, now it's 2022. Let's introduce some new flavors. Let's be brave and daring and try to change things up a bit
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@Binati_Sheth
Binati Sheth
@Binati_Sheth · 4:57

@Bendi_G We aren’t being defeatist. There’s a different set of priorities in the two indias.

However, PDAs in India who has lived in India, as an Indian who has had the privilege of working with multiple nationalities across the world, and PDAs in India who has had the privilege of traveling across Asia, I'd like to highlight one part of Asia which is there are two types of Asia and India is no exception to this. There is the rural part and the modern part
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@Bendi_G
Benedict Garrett
@Bendi_G · 4:59

@Binati_Sheth

I think there is a certain similarity in the sense that between metropolitan and rural areas are urban and rural. But even in the west, people in urban areas tend to be more open minded to things like this, particularly issues around sexuality and modernity and progressiveness and that sort of stuff generally, and I might even say public PDAs, whereas people in villages, even in England, tend to be more traditional, more conservative, more even prudish, more closed minded, I suppose in some ways
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@Binati_Sheth
Binati Sheth
@Binati_Sheth · 4:51

@Bendi_G It is about control ☹️

And I try to push back in big little ways, and that is why I'm the black sheep of the family and I wear that mantle proudly. And I so wish a lot of other people would do so as well. And that is where I'm seeing the change. A lot of young people are blatantly defined their families and I think that is going to reflect well on ours. Society in 2030 years. Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed
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@Bendi_G
Benedict Garrett
@Bendi_G · 3:34

@Binati_Sheth

And you're feeling that loss of control, because when you grow up in a familiar surrounding, you feel you have a control over that surrounding, control over your life. You know where you stand in that society
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@Binati_Sheth
Binati Sheth
@Binati_Sheth · 2:42

@Bendi_G

Same same. You know, you reflected the intention to have a conversation. And of course, I have to reflect the same back, I think, as one thing that social media sadly did. I mean, you know, it was supposed to fix this problem problem, but it didn't
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@Habkhan26
Habeeb Khan
@Habkhan26 · 1:52
Hey, Van D***, thank you so much for pointing this out and speaking about it. I know it's quite embarrassing, but that's how it is. Two years ago, when I was in a relationship, I'm in bank and Lower, actually, and never faced any such situations until now, despite the fact that I studied college in a very small city and even there I didn't face any situations
@Bendi_G
Benedict Garrett
@Bendi_G · 3:24
I'm English, but I've become part of their family. And they call me their big brother. And the mother calls me her son. But he's a very close person to me. And unfortunately, it's something that he's faced quite a lot. And apparently the police have actually beaten him, which upsets me. No end to be honest with you. But again, thank you very much contribution and hopefully we will speak again sometime
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