I'm very confused right now about this thing. Lately I'm just observing this in like 90% of the people I know. I am that introverted, extrovert person that actually opens up in only her comfort zone. So I just don't comment about these things whenever I found them. But I just wanted to ask you all, is this right thing you are doing? You are not being forced that you have to like that person. It's okay
They will pretend their best to show that they care, but they're never going to even let you know that they're not your fake friends, but they're going to do every single thing to hurt you. Because somewhere maybe they are jealous of you. Maybe they're insecure on their own. Maybe they have some mental problems which they are too insecure to open up about. So that's all I wanted to add
But as time goes on, we find few people not to be actually our type and sometimes their behavior might hurt us. So what people do is that sometimes when that person is absent because they cannot say it on their face, that might hurt them, they rent it out with their closest ones or their best friends that this or that might have hurt that person about what she or he did
Nila Biswas
@arpita3014_ · 1:26
So. Hi, Arina. This is Nila. So listening to this audio of yours, it reminded me of a particular someone who left me just a year back. She didn't leave me. I just let her go. Maybe you know the person actually, you know the person very well. Who am I talking about? It's like she just used me and left me just like that
CHANDRITA DAS
@Chandrita · 0:39
This is even the thing I have noticed means before the person they would pretend like he or she is the only friend they are connected with. And later whenever that particular member is absent from that group, the the other members start switching about the one who is not present. I think it's okay if they're talking about someone, but at least they should not pretend to be like best friends. I really do not understand if they are two different persons
Anuskaa Mitra
@sweet_kristy · 1:33
Apart from being toxic they can also be called as fake and two digit friends because when they are in front of the strength they are being polite. And yeah it's a very cheap activity. It should be stopped but it cannot be stopped if you tell them to stop. Also like don't do this thing because I'm not right. Still they will do they will pretend to be someone they are not in front of those them and then they are not present
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:37
Well, you are actually right, cause there is no point in stopping them. Because even if I try to do so, they won't stop. And they would continue like, they would actually like, continue to pretend whom they are not. So my efforts would go in then so I can do anything about it and they would actually continue to pretend like someone there. And yeah, you're right
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:44
I can't actually tell someone want to stop this thing because this is not right and I can't actually change their personality. But this topic is actually struck me so hard that I wanted to talk about it and I'm just doing so
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 1:22
And this whole thing depends on personality of that person. So in my opinion, I would like to say that if you don't like someone, don't actually pretend to be his or her best friend or close friend. Yeah, you can't avoid there are some situations in our life where we can't actually avoid people we are meeting every day and maybe those people are the people whom we don't like bad situations. I like that we have to talk with them and so on
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 3:07
Well maybe back b******* is not the correct word to use and you are right, it may be bending out of emotions but what I want to say is that there are some people whom I actually observe that they're maintaining this pretentious friendship Wallaceap and Baguette. Like I saw someone and I actually closely observed them that they call themselves as best friend. But when the other one is absent, the one that actually like for an example, I think it Das
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:56
And what do you think about pretentious friendship? Like, if someone is pretending to be your best friend and they don't like you, they are actually not. Then what do you think about this matter? Like, is it right? After all, at the end of the day, if you don't like the person, then why are you pretending to be a best friend of that person? That's my point
Nila Biswas
@arpita3014_ · 0:23
Yeah, I got your point. I just want to add one thing that be it in a relationship, be it in a friendship. If one of them is pretending, it will be visible to the other person in no time. Because how long can a person pretend after all? I mean, he or she would drop the act in no time. I mean, after all, it is very tiring to pretend now
khushi gupta
@KHUSHI_49 · 2:51
And I know that there are some people who don't b****** about anyone. But the thing is that we just cannot do anything to stop this thing. And according to me, as you ask them, what is this? Is it toxic or is it what according to me it's really toxic behavior of a person. It's the nature of a person actually
punitha B R
@Pooh · 1:25
So yes, the best thing is that you don't take revenge on them, but just start ignoring them and you can stay on your life and just enjoy it. You don't have to bother about what other people say. It really doesn't matter if they are your friend or not because your life is your life and you will live the way you want to. So this is my call on it
anushka nandy
@anushka8697 · 1:30
Hello Arina, after listening to your audio what I think is nowadays people do overthink a lot and that is why they don't easily open up in front of their close friends because they might think that they will lose them as their friends or their opinion will hurt them, but at the same time they do backpack about them in front of their other friends. I won't say them as toxic friends because they're actually scared to lose their close friends
Swell Team
@Swell · 0:15
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:34
Yeah, I do agree with the point that it's better to confess, Nandy to hide the fact that, like, you, whatever you have to tell about this person. Like, without telling that in the back of. Of that person, it's better to consist. Because at the end of the day, when the person gets to hear those things from another person, then that person would surely be hurt after hearing those words
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:42
Well firstly, thank you so much for replying. And I agree with the point that you say that we should ignore it because after all, it's not in our hands as because it completely depends upon that person and his or her personality so that we can't ever change. So without saying that you are doing things wrong. Because after all, if we just say that it won't bring any changes. And so I think it's better to ignore than to say in front of them
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:21
Well, I too agree with the point that we should ignore it as because. Well, like. Yeah, opinion, although varies in some cases, it's all about the person. Like. Yeah, it's completely normal that someone doesn't like another, that everyone has different tests. So. Yeah, I agree with the point that we should ignore it
Gunjan Aswal
@gunjanaswal · 0:28
Hello. I agree with you. I have experienced this a lot. That when a person is absent in a group, the rest of the group members speak about him. And those people who have this misconception that only they do this, nobody talks about them. I think if people can speak wrongly about one friend or group member, they can speak about everyone. And the more you stay away from such people, the better for you
Arina Sen Bakshi
@Arina24_ · 0:15
Well, yeah, I think this issue is very common, Das, because, like, it happens daily, Nandy regularly. But, yeah, we should avoid it, because, like, what can we do other than avoiding it or ignoring it? S